What is life like living in an orphanage or adoption center?

Question

I'm writing a story and in the beginning my character is in an orphanage and it has a great affect on her life and her trust and attachment issues. I want to know more about what it's like living in a modern day orphanage. If you know anything like if you lived in one as a child it would be great if you could tell me what you know. I don't want to show as the "mean dirty house" kind of thing like Annie. I really want to know what it's like if your a child who never gets adopted and grows up there. How do they do graduations and schooling and college and things like that? If you have any info please help so I can make my novel better and more accurate.

Answer 1

In the US, there are group homes which house 6 to 100s of children.  They are like a modern-day orphanges.  You must understand that the homes range in "niceness." ~ Some are like disgusting old orphanges and some are more modern.

Based on my experiences:

1)  There are no "parents" ~ there are group home workers and they don't really care about kids.  They are doing their jobs.  There is very little caring.

2)  The toys are old and broken.  Pieces are missing.  No-one ever donates "new" stuff to group homes, so you wind up playing with games that are half-broken.  Coloring books are gross because they have been used so much.  And anything new gets broken fairly quickly because there are so many kids.

3) If you personally own any stuff, it is stolen.

4) There are like 4 kids in a room, usually with bunk beds.  The blankets are not soft and the sheets stink.  It is sort of a institution smell.  If you really want to keep something, you stash it in your bed or under your mattress.

5)  The bathrooms are gross because not all kids use the bathroom correctly.  Some kids wipe p**p on the walls or p**p in their rooms and hide it.

6)  There might not be any holiday celebrations or birthday celebrations.  The bigger homes usually get donations, but your local, smaller home does not get ****.

7)  I wore everyone else's clothes.  I had no idea what was mine.

8)  Bigger kids bully the smaller kids.  It can be bad.

I don't believe group homes are good for foster children.  They are cold and it makes kids feel worse because they are thrown into a "sea of unwanted kids," where they need to battle their way to being safe.

They suck.

Answer 2

There are no orphanages or "adoption centers" (I don't even know what that is) in the United States anymore. There are orphanages in Russia and China, but not the U.S.

Answer 3

to further 'whatever's' comments.....I have worked in several orphanages for older children in Russia. I agree with her, it is horrible. I'll give you info on the best one....as the others are too difficult to talk about.

There were 250+ children in this orphanage. Within 1 mile, there were 4 other orphanages for children/teens...all containing as many or more children. That's 1250 children/teens in a 1 mile radius.

There was no steady running water, and no hot water. The children were expected to take showers when they could, but most of them did not since they all shared the same 2 stall shower. There was also 1 toilet for the children to use. It was frequently stopped up. The children stayed in bunk beds @ 8-10 per room. There were 2 adults in charge....2 people to watch and care for 250 kids. The food was decent, but it contained almost no protein, milk. 70% of the children had calcium deficiencies. All children went to school until the equivilant of the 2nd grade. School was taught in house, by local volunteers--no qualifications needed. After the 2nd grade, the kids were expected to participate in a 'life' course, that 'prepares' them for life outside the orphanage. Cooking, cleaning, ironing, making items, etc. Because the economic situation is rather bleak in Russia, however, these children would be the very last to ever be hired for a job. Most people who get even the worst jobs have college degrees, or at least high school. When the children were not in school or asleep, they had nothing to do. There were some who played soccer, but the majority just wandered around. The orphanage was an open campus....meaning the children were free to go and others could come in without anyone questioning them. There were frequently grown adult men within the walls of the orphanage, talking to little girls, drinking, giving the boys cigarettes, etc.

At 16, these children are 'celebrated' as they enter adulthood, and are sent out of the orphanage....to find a way to make it on their own. They are given no money, no job resources, and no housing.

Answer 4

I can tell you about an orphanage that my cousin was in in Smolensk Russia.  It was horrible.  The children had dirty cribs all lined up around cement rooms with tiny little windows where light could shine through.  They had little bowls where they'd sit to "do their duties" and they were rarely kept clean.  No bath; no running water.  There was a dog that came around and ate the kids food... hwat tiny bit they got/fought over.  The kids dirty clothing didn't fit, most were bare feet.  The children did play a little with each other, but when not playing, they rocked them selves back and forth for hours.

When he came home at 2 years old he was sick with a fever.  He would always hold food in his hands and when he went to sleep, he'd hide the food in his bed with him...  he'd grab food from the trash cans, if he saw any in it and he'd hide it somewhere else for later.  He was also afraid of toilets and bath tubs.  Yet he could get himself FULLY dressed...  I guess because in the orphanage, no one would do it for him.

Now, 10 years later, he is a healthy, happy, caring, teenager.