What is proper punishment for a 5 yr old boy who is always telling lies?

Question

he has been lying since he was 3 and is very slick. he lies when he dont have to. i put him in time out but its not working. he thinks he needs to lie to keep from getting into trouble. how can i make him understand lying is worse? he lies about if he broke something even if i saw him and it was an accident.

Answer 1

While I know it's a phase, and they ALL do it, it irritates me to no end when my daughter would lie to me.

What I did was set clear boundaries.  Say the crime was that she colored the dog with marker to make him look pretty.  The punishment for that would be helping wash the dog, right?  Say she lies and says Steve did it.  Well, not only do we KNOW Steve wasn't here, but we know she's lying.  Lying increases the punishment to helping wash the dog, the tub, the potty, the laundry or whatever other age appropriate chores are your least favorite.

I also sat mine down and said that if she continues to lie to me that I won't know when she's telling the truth (tummy hurts? you love me?  the barn's on fire?  it was an accident?)  I reread the Boy Who Cried Wolf with her, and likened the wolf to anything that could go wrong.  If you lie about little things, you'll lie about big things...

Another way to combat this one is to catch and thank your son when he IS telling the truth so he realizes it's not a totally bad thing to 'fess up.  In my home, if the offense is nothing major (who dug the hole kind of thing) she won't get in any trouble for digging holes if she admits to being the person responsible.

Hope it helps - they DO grow out of this eventually...

Answer 2

One don't use the bed room as punishment. This is a place of rest and play. Use a chair in the corner of a dinning room or hall way. But soap is an excellent deterrent also restrictions worked for my two girls ... I restricted them from privileges.

Answer 3

my son is 5 also and i have a 4 year daughter . What works for me is when they lie and I catch them I say. Tell me you are sorry right now for lieing to me. It hurts my feelings that you cannt be honest with your on moma. They usually put there head down an wont look at me until they say sorry. I tell my kids that if they lie to me to stay out of trouble then when i find out the punnishment will be a spanking and no cartoons for the day.  

Answer 4

Reward him when you see he has been honest.  

Answer 5

When my daughter was 5 and caught in a lie she got a bare bottomed hand spanking.

Answer 6

My daughter is almost 5 and she'll tell a fib here and there but we are quick to call her out on it so she sees no point in doing it. We don't give it too much attention, but we never let it go unnoticed. She's usually very honest about making mistakes and we are quick to thank her for being honest. You may want to try that, reward the positive behavior instead of focusing on the neg. (not saying that you do that). Also, if he has siblings, let him see them being praised for being honest and all other positive behaviors as well. Good luck!

Answer 7

my mum washed my mouth out with soap. she only had to do it once.

Answer 8

unless you dont spank all you can do is keep on putting him on time out. I go through this with the older of my twins she is the biggest liar i know does the same thing your son does she will do something in my face and then tell dad im lying about it cause i just want her to get in trouble so i dont have to deal with her (the twins are 6 then we have a 5 year old girl and a boy due in a few weeks) sooo its crazy house.

Whatg i do is early bed time or i dont let her do stuff the other kids do like bike riding or watch a movie before bed eat candy. She gets mad people think im mean but im sorry she is out of control. So i think to spice up time out by adding other punishments along these lines!

Answer 9

At this point he is old enough to give a more severe punishment than time out for lying.  Take something away that he really likes for a time.  Also, tell him that if he tells the truth the punishment will just be the time out, nothing more.  And keep your word about it.  Eventually he will see that telling the truth is much less painful.

Answer 10

a dab of dish detergent on the tongue.