What is really her problem?

Question

My daughter is in kindergarten. We have always had issue with her paying attention, sitting still, etc. She has high anxiety and gets physically sick if she is really worried. SHe chews on the inside of her mouth, picks at her fingernails, you name it. Her teacher and I are working very hard to make learning a non stressful thing. Our family doc put her on strattera which is helping with the attention and everything but not with the anxiety. The doc wouldn't give her anything for anxiety. Says he doesn't think she needs it. I should say that he treats me as though I am stupid and that I am just trying to get her on pills not help her. I don't want to have her medicated forever but I do think she needs to learn what she should feel like. She still doesn't sleep doesn't stay out of trouble. She knows she isn't supposed to do something and does it anyways multiple times. Should I change docs? Have you known a child like this? Tested for autism and fell just below.

Answer 1

I have one that can't sit in seat long, gets really really excited easily & moves a lot. She said she is NOT being defiant, she is just excited.

So we just gently remind her once a week "Remember what we are working on". I have not asked the teacher how she has been doing, but I ask my child & she tells me "I didn't get out of my seat today, etc). I try not to harp on her about it, but just gently remind her.

If you feel you need a second opinion, it can't hurt I am sure. I think though that they expect way to much out of 4-6 year olds being sitting still. My gosh their first year in school they expect them to stay seated all the time? Its not going to happen.

Answer 2

You definitely should see another doctor. One that specializes in these kind of kids. I have a stepson that is the same way. It took us 4 doctors before one finally was able to help him and help us. We got custody of him when he was 7 years old so we missed all those upbringing days, but they diagnosed him with ADHD and OCD. We had him on Adderall for years, now we have him on nothing. He is 14 years old now and is aware of his problems so now he tries to correct them himself.

Give it time all will make sense.

Good Luck!

Answer 3

you could try some stress-reduction techniques, like teaching her to take deep slow breaths when she's feeling anxious, learning yoga poses, etc.  possibly ask for a referral to a child psychologist or psychiatrist if you feel the anxiety is really bad ... personally i'd try routes other than medication first, as a lot of meds for children have potentially dangerous side effects.  not to say that medication is never appropriate, of course.

i had one kid with serious anxiety at school (so bad that she would actually not speak at school), and it helped tremendously to have her have a lot of playdates with friends from school.  once she was very comfortable with them, she was more comfortable in the classroom.  we also asked the kindergarten teacher to let us play in the classroom (me and my daughter) after school.  that worked great, too, as she started associating the classroom with very low-stress fun with me.  if you have a really fabulous kindergarten teacher, she might even let you start by playing alone in the classroom with your daughter and eventually have her come play with the two of you for 15 minutes or so.  something fun like a board game or coloring, or something that your daughter enjoys.  that can make an enormous difference too.

Answer 4

dont push her so hard ..dont be any overbearing mother looking for perfection. Dont insist she does things to your liking. Dont critisize her. dont be controlling.. a 5 yr old didnt get anxiety disorders from nothing..now you want to drug her..youre supr mom arent you? You gave her OCD

Answer 5

Some things can be even more helpful with managing anxiety than medication, namely healthy diets and exercise. Riding a bike or playing an active game for a set amount of time each day might help your daughter immensely with her concentration and anxiety. If you can, cut out all sugar from her diet (if you haven't already).

Also, you didn't mention what your home life is like. Is there something going on at home that might cause her undue stress? Is she having nightmares? Is she being bullied at school? Her anxiety might have an environmental cause.

In addition, setting strict schedules can really help children with ADD and anxiety problems; it makes them feel comforted. Perhaps you could buy your daughter a timer and use it to tell her how long she's expected to do each activity during the day (I'm not sure why this works, but apparently it does).

Answer 6

CHANGE DOCTORS! You say he treats you like you are stupid and you have to ask whether to dump him? You are the parent. No one is going to be your childs advocate but you! Find a doctor who listens to you and can help you figure out what is wrong with your daughter! Good Luck!

Answer 7

She's in kindergarden. Doesn't every little kid not sit still, picks their fingernails etc. They are all like that, i have a child thats in jk and she's the exact same thing. Expect she can't pay attention either, so i put her in the morning in a daycare place where she can learn, and they have fun with it.

They have fun with the kids and say 'If you complete this worksheet quietly and listen carefully we will play after'

Kids are all about playing, if you want your child to listen... then you need to think of what she likes best.

You tell her 'If you be good at school today we will go to the park (ex; your child loves the park) BUT, your teacher is going to tell me if your good' Then she will listen on from then because she knows shes able to go to the park and play.

As she gets older she will be normal, listening and stuff.

Be close with her, when she gets older she will tell you everything that happens, the boys, the work you know cool mom stuff we need to know =)

Stay close, be a cool mom. Her learning is in your hands.

hope i helped ;)