What is the age when children begin wondering who they are and who their parents are?

Question

My 10 year old great nephew has been raised to think that my niece's husband is his father but he is not. My great nephew does not have the same last name of every one else in the family and he don't look like his brother or sister

10 points.

Answer 1

I think that by now he should have question that. Most kids start to notice those things around 5 or 6, when they reach school. Then they start observing the other kids and start to wonder. I think that someone should have told him by now too. It's just going to be harder as he gets older because he will feel that they have been keeping it from him.

Answer 2

a friend of mine did not give it a second thought most of his life. His mom said she  gave him her maidden name because they weren't married yet and that is why his brother had one last name and him another. In highschool he found out his dad was not his dad.  

What they are doing is not healthy they need to start having honest conversations with  

Answer 3

You need to tell him ASAP. My friend was 13 and her mom told her she was adopted. It caused so much chaos. She called her parents liars, ran away, and caused so much chaos. They ended up having to take her to a counsler.

Just sit him down and tell him the truth. Explain how you didn't tell him the truth (don't use the term lied) to protect him. If he has questions, ANSWER THEM. Don't beat around the bush. Good luck!

Answer 4

I think now is about the time he should be told, even if he isn't asking. Leaving something like that too long can cause a lot of chaos when a child is older. He needs to know who his real parents are.

As for when they start asking-my eldest son has no contact with his dad and for the past 2 years he has been asking a lot of questions about him. He is 12 in October.

Answer 5

honestly i think  up until you give them any reason to doubt or if someone tells him.  i had a cousin that was raised by my great grandparents but was really my great aunts baby.  he was raised to think they were his parents -- he never even knew till after they passed away.  messed up but that stuff happens.  

Answer 6

wow.. i thought that was going to be a newborn /toddler question. that is the strangest thing ive read here all day.. a 10 year old not knowing who their parents are? my 13 month old son knows who his parents are.. they know mommy from birth simply because they recognize the voice from inside the womb, and shes the first person (typcically) to hold cuddle and feed the child when they come out, and most of the time if not every single time after that. daddy comes a little bit later, but its something inborn, they just figure it out quickly. we live with my inlaws (woo hoo) and my son LOVES my father in law, but at the same time its nothing compared to catching a glimpse of daddy coming home from work, or when prompted "wheres daddy?!" the way he darts his eyes around the room. they just know. so back to your point, a 10 year old being raised by a father who is not his own sounds like he might just be trying desperately to fit in with the family and the other kids by calling him "dad".. and knows that he isnt his "real" father, but let me tell you i have a friend with 3 sons, 2 dads. the first was a real @$$hole and the second is the "father" of them all. son #1 knows that it isnt his "real" dad, but he still takes care of him like his own , and lets him call him dad. people adapt to whats given , i guess

Answer 7

Just calmnly sit him down and tell him what he does not know, the truth. Children start  depending of their level of curiosity. But most know who their parents are when they're at least a few months old.

Answer 8

Dont worry as long as you can give him a nice life and notoring

he wouldnt ask that in short time

Explain to him...he got diff name

coz bla..bla...

white lie.....