What is the best way not to feel fear and react

Question

Tonight I watch a elderly man fall and I did nothing. This is not the person I want to be, but that is who I am. I can not change the past but the future has potential.

I will probably never have opportunity to apologize for not reacting. And everything happened so fast I could not describe him.

I had 4 glasses in my hand and I did not think about dropping the glasses or grabbing him with one hand. The only one thing that ran though my mind was, If I grab him the glasses will hit the table he is falling against and shatter harming more people and make the situation worse.

What is the best way to think positive and react? I do not want to fear the outcome, I want to react instinctively without the fear. How can I not fear fear its self ?

Answer 1

Fear is natural and productive. You can't help but feel it.

You choose your reactions based on what you believe. They are thus chosen ahead of time.

Also, priorities are important. If you were so focused on not breaking the glasses that you allowed him to fall, what was your actual priority? Preventing injury, or not dealing with the glass?

Everything happens quickly in an emergency. It is the split-second decisions that make our futures, not the ones that everyone believes are life-shatteringly-important.

Choose before it happens. It's the only way to make any of it work quickly enough to react. You'll still feel fear, but if you believe that your reaction is correct, you'll do the right thing.

Personally, I believe that life is more important than glass. A falling person stands to have more damage done to them than falling glass (in small amounts) is likely to do to others.

Another thing to consider: might shattering glass have made the elderly man's fall worse? I can't tell, as I wasn't there. It's something you'll have to decide for your own situation. Perhaps it's possible that you did exactly the right thing.

Answer 2

just do it and dont think but its sometimes useful to think first and act second if its something not that bad think about it but if its something serious just do it and move  

Answer 3

I don't know the entire situation but it looks to me as if you did some quick thinking about not shattering glass and injuring more people, so I can't really fault your action if that was the case. Next time if you can't be there to aid in time, be sure to call out to anyone, "Help that man!" and if others are nearby I'm sure they will.

As to eliminating fear, it is simply a matter of becoming familiar with what is the unknown. One man's fear of heights is another man's every day work as he helps in construction work on a tall building and walks along the grids high above. Likewise a fear of public speaking. There you'd join a club to practice and improve.

There is a way around every dilemma!

Answer 4

The best way to kill a sitting fly is to hit instantly and without any hestitation.  Any second thoughts about how to kill it is likely to be enough for it to fly away unharmed.  It's true, from time to time, you need to think and move very fast, and you cannot be concerned about details.  Sometimes it can even save your own life, as it has mine.  I'm not sure how to train anyone to react that way, without hestitation from fear----what I do know very clearly is that fear itself can end up killing me.

Answer 5

I want you to imagine i am yelling at you because i assure you i am. YOU CANNOT ACT OUTSIDE YOURSELF EVERYTHING YOU DO IS YOURSELF. DO NOT FEAR THAT, DO NOT REGRET THINGS JUST LEARN FROM THEM. YOU WANT TO ACT INSTINCTIVELY STOP DESIRING TO DO SO AND ACT YOUR DESIRE IS YOUR THOUGHTS AND THAT'S WHY YOU CANT ACT BECAUSE YOU DESIRE. LET GO OF DESIRE AND YOU LOSE YOUR THOUGHT AND GAIN INSTINCT. Not yelling in anger by the way but i think this is more effective for the situation. You are not applying yourself you are evaluating situations as i used to do. Everything must be analyzed in your mind before it can be acted upon out of fear for making the wrong move. I used to enjoy that mind and now ive changed that mind. Use some sort of meditation to stop your thoughts for a while and learn to see some of the thoughts you have I'm sure you will see they are not all necessary ones.

Answer 6

What would you expect from other to do to you in a particular situation.This what you do to others as well. It's simple..As soon as you see someone that needs help, go ask if he needs help. He may say NO ( if he says no, don't touch him/her). If he says Yes, ask in what way, he will direct you. One day you will need help in the street, what would you think of those that do not get involved? Remember: what goes around, comes around !

Answer 7

Fear is pain arising from the anticipation of evil. Bravery is being afraid and reacting anyway.

Answer 8

If you really want a clear conscience about this. Just remember this always. when it is time for them to die it is their time no matter how it will come upon. We cannot teach our adrenalin it just happen. So stop replaying what you haven't done which you should. Nope it doesn't work that way. From that outbreak make the best of what you can do. if you have done nothing it doesn't mean your bad. Just care enough to give a little prayer everyday for those whose who needed it. You might never know you are simply saving a lot.

Answer 9

Don't feel bad,it's just the way it was,you were focusing on the glasses and not harming more and that's good. You can't be called Superman,but that's o.k.,who can. It's also good, that you know just what happened, and if you were a bad person you wouldn't care at all.