What is the best way to deal with an angry 5 years old ?

Question

What is the best way to deal with an angry 5 years old ?

Answer 1

figure out what is causing the anger. Take a look at the diet cut out the sugar etc.Keep a record at when the child get the angriest what sets them off etc. All in all have lots of patience. try rewarding the good behavoir instead of focusing on the bad.

Answer 2

just make him feel belonged and cared for

tell the kiddo there's no need to be angry

and what he asks will be given provided its fine to be had

tell him how much his anger hurts u and others

speak softly to the kid

avoid exposing the child to television violence

and have an eye on his friends

someone might be instilling wrong ways in him

Answer 3

If your calm then he should be calm...talk soft...so he has to slow down and listen...then say why are you angry and give him a cookie for behaving and give him praise when he does good.....don't get on him about being angry as its emotions that we all have..but if its really out of hand...ask a child psychologist....what he/she recommends....DO NOT handle with meds....start by eliminating things like sugar and foods with fat....healthy food and healthy kids are happy kids..Good Luck...

Answer 4

lots and lots of patience! Find out what is making him angry then work from there. Teach him/her how to verbalize their emotions. "Ok how did that make you feel? It made mommy feel ........." That sort of thing...sounds cheesy but actually works. Good luck.

Answer 5

I have two children.  With one I can take away toys or games, but that doesn't seem to help with the younger one. The younger one  responds better to time out.  He can't stand to miss anything, so when he does I see changes in his behavior (most of the time anyway).

Answer 6

There must be something bothering him,take the time to ask about his day.Mabe you will find the source of the problem.He might open up about what makes him feel angry.Don't force the question on him,though.If they don't feel comfortable telling you,give them some time.

Answer 7

Take away there toys

Answer 8

The child is angry for a reason.

What happened to cause the anger - find out and deal with it.

It could also be the food you are feeding the child.  Fresh fruits and vegetables (no packages, tins, bottled- drinks) and meat and poultry (nothing frozen).  Cut out or cut down snacks and sweet things and bubbly drinks.

The anger could also be a chemical imbalance to do with the child is eating.

Answer 9

First, you have to be calm.  Don't react angrily yourself, or be overly fussy about his issue.  Just calmly say something like, "you seem angry.  Tell me what's bothering you".  If the child is too distraught to speak, then proceed to tell them to "okay, take a deep slow breath, and count slowly to 10, then tell me why you are angry".  If they do not respond without yelling/crying/shouting/whining, etc, then tell them that they need to speak plainly or you can't understand, then I would basically ignore the situation until they speak properly.   They will quickly understand that to communicate they need to "get a grip" and you'll be amazed at how well and quickly they will learn to do just that.  But if you give in and coddle immediately, you are asking for trouble down the line.  At 5 yrs old, they are old enough to understand they are causing a scene in public, and what is acceptable behavior and what is not.  If they do this at home, well, they have all the time in the world to sit quietly until they are able to speak normally and tell you what their problem is.   Sometimes, they cannot verbalize a complex problem well, and once they try to begin to (in a controlled manner) it can help to give them words to use to help them.   (If they are jealous of something another child has or gets to do that is off limits for them... it may be hard for them to explain well... so when they say: " Billy has a popsicle", you can respond that "oh, you are angry because Billy has something that you wanted too..?"  Then you can go from there...  helping them use their own words has HUGE benefits for them (and you).   Just remember that you have to stay "above" the situation and not get emotionally involved or take sides.  Stay neutral and they will calm down much easier.  If you freak out too, they will really lose it.

You also have to remember not to ASK the child to do something.  You have to be in charge and control... don't say "why don't you take a deep breath.....", say "Take a deep breath".  It is very easy to slip into asking the children for permission to do what you want them to do...  They need us to be in control... it is safer for them if there are limits and rules and directions.   Best of luck to you.

Answer 10

Many children at this age are angry when they don't know how to calm down, think, and talk things out.

First thing you need to do is have the child calm down. Have the child check in by putting his hands on his belly and taking a deep breath. Then have the child count out loud and say calm down. When the child is calm have the child tell you what the problem is. Tell the child to use his words. Do not let the child yell at you or cry at you. Tell the child you cannot understand if there is crying or yelling. Once the child has told you what the problem is ask the child to help you figure out how to solve it. Every child should be taught to use their words. A child that does not know how to calm down and talk is one angry child.

Answer 11

Don't let them bring you down to their level, stay calm, don't react. Most kids with anger issues are simply looking for a way to justify their anger (see I had to be hateful b/c she is screaming at me). They aren't sure how to respond when faced with someone who does not react and it creates an opportunity to teach the child a better way.

Give the child an outlet and remember anger is a perfectly acceptable emotion it's what you do with that anger that may not be acceptable. They can draw angry pictures, shout into a pillow, walk outside and stomp and scream but it isn't ok to scream at another person, hit another person or threaten someone.

Is the child surrounded by anger at home, at school, in his/her neighborhood? If he/she is in a bad situation the anger may be justified.

If the childs anger is getting in the way of forming friendships, maintaining decent grades in school or disrupting family life then the child and family may need to see a therapist.

Answer 12

Children need and respond well to positive behaviour.  It makes them feel valued, boosts confidence, self esteem and self worth.

- Offer positive reinforcement for good behaviour. A positive reinforcer is an event which, when presented immediately following a behaviour, causes the behaviour to increase – reward. Social praise can be given immediately, enthusiastically, and consistently and disappears once given, e.g. hugs, smiles, “good work”, and “well done”. Some reinforcers are more difficult to give, e.g. going to the park; sweets after tea. Praising and rewarding children reinforces behaviour that we want to be repeated.

- Ensure the child has a consistent routine. When a child cannot depend upon a routine or are interrupted by regular modifications, their behaviour tends to reflect the routine - chaotic and inconsistent. Children need consistency in their daily routines. Structured appropriately, a routine can help reinforce positive behaviours in children and minimise negative behaviours.

- Physical punishment is not necessary, acceptable or effective.

- Respond to unwanted behaviour by using possible sanctions appropriate for varying situations:

Changes to the routine

Modifying behaviour

Time with an adult

Play tutoring

Time out

Removal of privilege

Rewards.

- The A-B-C of behaviour:

Antecedent - What happens or leads up to the observed behaviour

Behaviour - the observed behaviour - what the child says and how s/he acts (this is any behaviour, both positive and negative)

Consequence - What happens following the behaviour.

Children's behaviour expectations:

At age 4-5 years -

• Can behave appropriately at mealtimes

• Able to share/take turns/ play co-operatively

• Becoming more independent & self assured

• Can be determined, may argue, may show aggression

- At age 5-6 years

• Understands different rules apply in different places and can adapt

behaviour accordingly

• Can co-operate in group- but not ready for team games.

Consider the following factors when accessing whether the child's behaviour is appropriate or not:

Are there any underlying causes that can be resolved? e.g. child too hot, hungry, tired etc.

How does the behaviour link to stage of development?

Is this behaviour linked to changes in the child’s life?

Is the behaviour repeated?

Has the child learnt this behaviour from copying another child?

Is it as a result of boredom?

Was the child aware of the goals and boundaries relating to his/her behaviour? E.g. was he/she aware that they are not allowed to throw sand?

Hope this is of some help, please email me if you need further advice on a particular negative behaviour, e.g. biting.

Answer 13

for you to  calm the child down, you would have known what he/she love best, if she/he is displaying the anger through crying, let him/her cry for sometime afterthat,carry  her on your shoulder and talk gently and tell him/her that you going to buy sweet, biscuit or whatever, she/he like best. you have to give a little time for her/him to cry inorder to show as if you dont care initially because most children behalf so badly  if you start to calm them immediately they start crying.