What is the best way to respond to a guy that puts down my desire to have kids someday?

Question

I'm in my mid 20s, self sufficient and financially stable, and looking to have kids in the next couple of years. The kid subject is a very sensitive touchy subject for me!! The reason for this is because I had a miscarriage 2 yrs ago...even worse, prior to the miscarriage people judged me to be "incapable" and "not ready" even though I felt established, and even though these same people were meanwhile congratulating same-age(or slightly younger) girls on THEIR pregnancies! The pain of people discrediting me still stings 2 yrs later. Also, I want kids before I'm 30. As time goes on, I think about the miscarriage and my desire to have kids more and more.

Two yrs after people misjudged me, I'll STILL encounter the occasional guy "friend" who will abrasively joke, "Heh I could never imagine you being a parent, yeah right", etc. Ironically some of these guys have kids themselves, or are looking to! It really bothers me when they say these things. What is the best way to react to this??

Answer 1

Don't just walk away it isn't worth your time & energy.  Cut them off when they do that to you the first time & avoid them when you see them.

Answer 2

Some people obviously don't know when to shut the eff up! The best thing to do is to brush your shoulders off...remember that actions speak louder than words. You can tell them that you've changed til you are blue in the face and they still won't get it. When you do have a baby, you can show them by your actions that you are a great mom! You should also remember that they don't know how that miscarriage truly has affected you, MAYBE if they knew they wouldn't touch that subject.

Answer 3

if you are ready to have kids than have kids. that is your choice. When people say that just turn your head and walk off

Answer 4

personally, my response to the cop-out "learn to take a joke" is "it's only a joke if everybody's laughing".

as for them judging you, don't be afraid to be as rude as they are - tell them straight up you don't appreciate them putting you down like that.

Answer 5

Tell them that you know you'd be the best mother they'd ever seen...

Just be confident, sincere, and direct. You will put them in their place.