What is the funniest joke that you have ever heard?

Question

Say what the funniest joke you have ever heard.

Answer 1

muffin joke:

two muffins were in an oven cooking

one muffin turns to the other and says

"its hot in here"

the other one says

"HOLY CRUD A TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

that was the funniest, not anything wrong with it.

second funniest still nothing bad

The Living Statues

Two statues stood in a city park: one female and the other male. These statues faced each other for many years.

Early one morning, an angel appeared before the statues and said, "Since the two of you have been exemplary statues and have brought enjoyment to many people, I am giving you your greatest wish. I hereby give you the gift of life. You have 30 minutes to do whatever you desire."

And with that command, the statues came to life. The two statues smiled at each other, ran toward some nearby woods and dove behind a couple of bushes. The angel smiled to himself as he listened to the two statues giggling, bushes rustling, and twigs snapping.

After fifteen minutes, the two statues emerged from the bushes, satisfied and smiling.

Puzzled, the angel looked at his watch and asked the statues, "You still have fifteen minutes. Would you like to continue?"

The male statue looked at the female and asked, "Do you want to do it again?"

Smiling, the female statue said, "Sure. But this time YOU hold the pigeon down and I'll c**p on its head!"

Answer 2

what the funniest joke you have ever heard.

(You said.....SAY, " what the funniest joke you have ever heard. haha.)

Answer 3

i just posted this for 'who has the best blonde joke' but i'll out it here too yea, i can laugh at my hair color.

A blonde and her husband are lying in bed listening to the next door neighbor's dog.

It has been in the backyard barking for hours and hours.

The blonde jumps up out of bed and says "I've had enough of this," and she goes downstairs.

The blonde finally comes back up to bed and her husband says "The dog is still barking, what have you been doing?"

The blonde says "I put the dog in our backyard, let's see how THEY like it!"

another one:

One day a cop was driving down the road when the car in front of him swerves sharply to the left and then to the right and then back to the left again. He turns on his lights and siren and pulls the car over.

When he approaches the driver he finds a blonde in the driver's seat obviously shaken from her experience. He asks her was she thought she was doing and she replied "oh Officer it was horrible! I was driving along when all of the sudden there was a tree in front of me! I swerved to the left to avoid it and there was another tree!! I then swerved to the right and there was another tree right in front of me! Then I swerved back to left and saw another one!! I don't understand what happened."

The cop looks at her and says "lady, that is your air freshener"

one more:

A blonde from California decides to try horseback riding, even though she has had no lessons or prior experience. She mounts the horse unassisted and the horse immediately springs into motion. It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle.

In terror, she grabs for the horse's mane, but cannot seem to get a firm grip. She tries to throw her arms around the horse's neck, but

she slides down the side of the horse anyway. The horse gallops along, seemingly oblivious to its slipping rider. Finally, giving up her frail grip, she leaps away from the horse to try and throw herself to safety.

Unfortunately, her foot has become entangled in the stirrup, she is now at the mercy of the horse's pounding hooves as her head is struck against the ground over and over. As her head is battered against the ground, she is mere moments away from unconsciousness when to her great fortune . . . the Supermarket manager sees her and shuts the horse off.

Answer 4

what kind of bee's produce milk?

'boo-bee's!!'

ahahahhahahahah

Answer 5

the one about the 12inch pianist

Answer 6

ask me who killed soulja boy

who?

youuuuuuuuuu

   get it cause there song     ps please pick as best answer

Answer 7

Why did the chicken cross the road?

help me

http://ca.answers.yahoo.com/question/ind...