What is the funniest joke you know?

Question

I like rude jokes.

Answer 1

There was an english man an irish man and a scottish man and they went on a plane .  The plane was about to crash so they had to throw stuff off the plane . The english man threw off a trolley and when he got off the plane he saw a little girl crying and he said " little girl why are you crying " and the girl says " my dog just got squashed  by a trolley ". " oh " the man says .  and he walked off  .  The Irish man threw off a piano , and when he got off the plane he saw a little boy crying and he says "little boy why are you crying " and the boy says " my granny just got squashed  by a piano ". " oh " the man says .  and he walked off .  

The scottish man threw of a bomb and when he got off a plane He saw a little girl laughing , and he said " little girl , why are you laughing "?  and she said " my dad did a f**t and the whole house blew up !! ".

Answer 2

The pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won.

The pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the race again, and it won again.

The local paper read:

PASTOR'S *** OUT FRONT.

The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the pastor not to enter the donkey in another race.

The next day, the local paper headline read:

BISHOP SCRATCHES PASTOR'S ***.

This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the pastor to get rid of the donkey.

The pastor decided to give it to a nun in a nearby convent.

The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following headline the next day:

NUN HAS BEST *** IN TOWN.

The bishop fainted.

He informed the nun that she would have to get rid of the donkey, so she sold it to a farmer for $10.

The next day the paper read:

NUN SELLS *** FOR $10.

This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the nun to buy back the donkey and lead it to the plains where it could run wild.

The next day the headlines read:

NUN ANNOUNCES HER *** IS WILD AND FREE.

The bishop was buried the next day.

The moral of the story is . . . being concerned about public opinion can bring you much grief and misery ...

even shorten your life.

So be yourself and enjoy life.

Stop worrying about everyone else's *** and you'll be a lot happier and live longer

Answer 3

your name along with your pic is  the best joke...! lol

Answer 4

Did you hear about the skeleton that went to the funeral? He had no BODY to go with...

That Joke is HIGH-Larious

Answer 5

You are beautiful and wise

Answer 6

Hear about the man who took a viagra tablet which got stuck in his throat?......... He woke up in the night with a stiff neck.

Answer 7

I would say the "I don`t want ******* cornflakes joke

Answer 8

urrrr facccccccce

lol ok sorry that was childish lol

Answer 9

When Mrs Monte Carlo went out with Mr Milk Coffee, she didn't mind him playing with her Milk Bars.  But when he put his Scotch Finger into her Spicy Slice, she grabbed him by the Ginger Nuts and made him Sao.