What is the funniest jokes that can make you laugh.

Question

no thumbing down on the answers all the jokes are funny if you understand them what's funny to them might not be funny to you.the most thumbs up wins.

Answer 1

The Indiannippleless Five Hundred"

A young Native American woman went to a doctor for her first ever physical exam. After checking all of her vitals and running the usual tests, the doctor said, "Well, Running Doe, you are in fine health. I could find no problems. I did notice one anomaly, however." "Oh, what is that, Doctor?" "Well, you have no nipples." "None of the people in my tribe have nipples," she replied. "That is amazing," said the doctor. "I'd like to write this up for The South Carolina Journal of Medicine, if you don't mind." She said, "OK." "First of all" asked the doctor, "how many people are in your tribe?" She answered, "approximately 500." "And what is the name of your tribe?" asked the doctor. Running Doe replied, "We're called ......" (I hate to do this to you) "The Indiannippleless Five Hundred"

  

Answer 2

johnny: mommy, mommy, i can't stop going in circles

mommy: shut up or i'll nail your other foot to the floor.

Answer 3

Su Wong marries Lee Wong. The next year, the Wongs have a new baby. The nurse brings them over a lovely, healthy, bouncy, definitely Caucasian white baby boy! "Congratulations," says the nurse to the new parents. "What will you name the baby"? The puzzled father looks at his new baby boy and says, "Well, two Wong's don't make a white, so I think we will name him Sum Ting Wong!

P.S: LOL SUNSHINE THAT IS SOMETHING FUNNY!!!!!!

Answer 4

This is not a joke..but in ways it is...Do this

Ask someone if they want a hurt donut if they say yes hit them on the arm or where ever and say...hurt don't it...  

Answer 5

a little old lady told me this yesterday:

there once was an old country store. on the front steps sat a little boy and a big dog. a man going to the store walked up to the boy and said, "that's a nice lookin' dog, does he bite?"

the boy said, "my dog doesn't bite, sir."

so the man reached down and patted the dog on the head. the dog bit his hand pretty hard.

the man was angry at the little boy and asked, "i thought you said your dog didnt bite!?!"

and the boy said, "that aint my dog."

:)  

Answer 6

once upon a time there was an elephant, who fell in love with an ant, but the ant refused the proposal. when her friend asked why she denied it, she said,

                            "the boy's teeth were too big"  

Answer 7

A cowboy rode into town and stopped at a saloon for a drink. Unfortunately, the locals always had a habit of picking on strangers, which he was. When he finished his drink, he found his horse had been stolen.

He goes back into the bar, handily flips his gun into the air, catches it above his head without even looking and fires a shot into the ceiling.

"WHICH ONE OF YOU SIDEWINDERS STOLE MY HOSS?" he yelled with surprising forcefulness. No one answered.

"ALRIGHT, I'M GONNA HAVE ANOTHA BEER, AND IF MY HOSS AIN'T BACK OUTSIDE BY THE TIME I FINNISH, I'M GONNA DO WHAT I DUN IN TEXAS! AND I DON'T LIKE TO HAVE TO DO WHAT I DUN IN TEXAS!"

Some of the locals shifted restlessly. He had another beer, walked outside, and his horse is back! He saddles-up and starts to ride out of town.

The bartender wanders out of the bar and asks, "Say partner, before you go... what happened in Texas?"

The cowboy turned back and said, "I had to walk home."

Answer 8

martin-tv show.

(situiation)-they are on a subway bus trapped on xmas and martin sees a lady that is hungry.he is with his wife gina.

old lady-ooo i am so hungry.

martin-gives her a look like she is crazy because she looks at his sandwhich.(i laugh).

gina-martin please give her the sandwhich she's a old lady its xmas.

*took gina alot but martin gave in and gave the old lady the sandwhich*

old lady-thank you so much sir.

old lady-*sniffs sandwhich*.TUNA!?!?!?....I DONT WANT NO !!!DAMM!!!

TUNA.*drops the sandwhich and steps on it*.

*I CRY LAUGHING*

Answer 9

1 )what do you called a Mexican driving a stick shift car? EMANUEL. 2)what would happen if two cars driving on a one way street? DEAD-END FOR BOTH DRIVERS.

Answer 10

Of all the hardware holding a car together, the loosest nut is behind the wheel!

Never make love behind the garden gate. Love is blind, the neighbors ain't!

Trees give birth to boughs.

Answer 11

what's your life long dream? not to have nightmares when I wake up.

Answer 12

It was a really hot day and this blonde decided she would go buy a coke. She went to the coke machine and when she put her money in, a coke came out - so she kept putting money in.

And since it was such a hot day, a line had formed behind her. Finally, a guy in line said, "Will you hurry up? We're all hot and thirsty!"

And the blonde said, "No way. I'm still winning