What is the funniest line you've ever used to put someone in their place?

Question

I had been working for a friend, but I really wasn't a good fit. After being sick and tired of them constantly s******g up the schedule (and then punishing me with passive aggressive behavior when I said "those hours will not work - change them"). Well - the last straw happened when they knew I was IN a wedding and they scheduled me anyway. I decided I was quitting w/o notice. My friend learned of this (dear husband told him) and said, "You can't do that!" I looked at him and said, "Oh, I think I just DID!"

We're still friends, btw.

Answer 1

when i was younger i was fat. lol

and there was this one girl that would ALWAYS find a way to make fun of me about it. So one day i was like "I'm sorry that you are so depressed that your face looks like a cow chewed it up and spit it out. that you spend all your time making fun of me." =)

that's not really funny lol

can you help me?

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;...

Answer 2

Well it's not funny but my boyfriends ex wife is always calling because she needs money. And he pays $600.00 a month in child support. She don't have a job. So last time she called for $350.00 I got PISSED off he lives with me and spent our rent money to give her to pay her bills. I called her and told her GET A JOB. It's funny cus I am a very quite person who lets people run me over.  

Answer 3

someone in my gym class was making fun of this eigth grade girl. He keeps on saying "you look like an *** with the scar on your face". I couldnt take it anymore so I told him "atleast, that scar doesnt make her look like an a*****e like you"

then he didnt say anything else after that.

Answer 4

When I was in 4th grade there was this horrible, mean girl. I went to gym with her and she said something to me (i can't remember what) so I told her "If mean was dynamite, you'd explode!"

lol. I wasn't so good at come backs back then.

Answer 5

Its not funny, but I'll say

And your point is?

Answer 6

During a work lunch meeting, one co-worker brought up the topic of whether they'll get a coffee maker in the teacher's room. Our head teacher said that she inquired about it but said they won't. A few raised a stink about it especially the one who really wanted it. I was quiet. I didn't care for it. And honestly, it was a stupid topic to begin with. They looked at me & then, my head teacher asked if I was disappointed. I said, "No, get over it. It's only a coffee maker." They all looked at me as if I was the biggest "B." That guy who wanted the coffee maker shush up after that.