What is the funniest thing you've ever heard a child say?

Question

In a Chinese restaurant last night I overheard a boy who must have been around 5 tell his father that Chinese water tastes an awful lot like American water.

Answer 1

it is not so much funny as cute. But when my mother in law passed away our niece was devastated. So her mom told her that she could still talk to grandma anytime she wants to in heaven. Since she had moved 2 years earlier, she was used to talking to her on the phone a lot. So she looked at her mom and she said Mom I really need to get that number.

Answer 2

It's hard to pick just one, but...

After a couple of hours of shopping at the mall, my then 3 year old daughter and I stopped off at a friend's house to meet her 2 week old baby.

After settling in, my friend placed the blanket wrapped infant

on my daughter's lap.

My little girl's face lit up with awe and excitement, and after a few moments she looked up at the new mother and asked, "Where did you BUY this?".

Answer 3

Well, it's not something the kid said, it was what he did.

One of my friend's relatives had died, so they went to the funeral. Her little two-year-old cousin was there.

The funeral started, and when the organ player started to play, her little cousin just smiled and started clapping, as if applauding him.

Even though it was a bleak time, everyone laughed.

Answer 4

It is kinda mean but my younger brother, when he was 4 or so, said "Red lights (stop lights) are like fat chicks, I don't like red lights." It was way funny and he thought of it himself.

Answer 5

My nephew went to the hospital to see his new sibling

He look at the girl, and said "Mommy can we bring it back and get a boy"

He was four

Answer 6

Thats rather perceptive

Answer 7

My sister was driving my nephew on a street adjacent to their city park. My nephew, very young, kept asking what each sign said. At one he asked and his mom replied: Dogs not allowed in park. My nephew asked after giving it time for thought: Mom, can dogs read?

Answer 8

Is mommys milk tanks empty

Answer 9

When my son was a baby, I had a two year old daughter.  She was watching me apply diaper cream to the yeast infection on his bottom and asked me, "Mommy, why are you putting that stuff on him"?  I replied, "He has an infection so I am using this cream on him."

She walked away and returned shortly with her doll and said to me, "Mommy, can you please put cream on my baby?  He has a erection, too."

Answer 10

My cousin was babysitting a two year old girl and a three year old boy. She babysat them alot. She knew it was time to stop bathing them together when the little girl blurted out during bathtime..."Lauren look! Tyler's got a tail!"

Answer 11

My little sister-in-law (she's 6 now---about 5 at the time of the incident) had a belly ache one evening (she had to go to the bathroom). When her mother asked what was wrong, she replied "I'm pregnant...with puppies." My MIL about died with laughter. (both her older sister & I were pregnant & she is obsessed with dog/puppies).

My niece wanted a Happy meal one evening and asked her Grandmother (my MIL) to buy her one. My MIL told her she didn't have any money to get her one. My niece replied "Grandma, you go to Bingo and win money so you can buy me a happy meal." She knows my MIL goes to Bingo every Monday night.

One evening when my son was about 2 years old, I put something on the coffee table and I told him not to touch it. He says to me "No no don't touch it mom!!".

Answer 12

My 4 year old son was having a discussion with my 2 year old and he said "A dinosaur ate my underwear!" and my 2 year old goes "Really? A dinosaur?!"