What is the most hilarious quote you or someone you know has ever heard or said?

Question

It can be random or an inside joke or anything.

Answer 1

the most hilarious well joke i heard was

what does the g*y horse eat

heyyy in like a g*y way

Answer 2

"The eyes are the windows to your face." This one's not as accurate as the other, but it's the same person. "I can't trust a cactus because they have no eyes."

Answer 3

"I couldn't LIVE without water."

"My mom was gonna call the orphanage but I put the phone cord under my bed..."

Answer 4

Some hilarious quotes:

1. "My mind not only wanders, sometimes it leaves completely."

2. "Every time I think about exercise, I lie down til the thought goes away."

Answer 5

uhm yea 2 points ; ]

Answer 6

well i know how everybody thinks that everything anybody does is g*y like

"those shoes are g*y" or "school is g*y" and if somebody say something that sound g*y they would say"no homo" and me and my friends hate that so much so that everytime something like that comes up we would say "take your pants of all homo"

it's a inside joke u have to pick my anwser for best answer to hear the story  i have lots more but i am running out of room   lol!

Answer 7

it works when someone says anything you say after wards "thats what she said"

Answer 8

"A hard man is good to find. — Mae West"

Answer 9

"my eyelashes hurt" lol, :)

Answer 10

"hey so did you study your state capitals on your date last night?'

'even better, the countries and there capitals!!"

"countries dont have capitals"

(and she was dead serious)

okay, same girl but not as good of quote

"Who was the only guy in basketball to score (i forget what) in one game?"

"wasnt that michael jackson?"

(same girl)

"I JUST FELL INTO A FOUNTAIN!"

(same girl)

"hey is it possible to fall up stairs?"

"i think.. but youd have to be really stupid to do so.."

"oh... i think i just fell up the stairs"

all of these she was dead serious.. haha MANY more! i just cant think of them at the moment

Answer 11

this just happened

i was talking to my friend over AIM and she said she kept getting IMs from a guy that she didnt know ( i think it was one over her friends pranking her) and she was like well how did you find me and he said i saw your myspace and wanted to talk to you so she told him that was creepy...and illegal and he said no its not actually

it was just sooo funny the way he said it

can you help?

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?...

Answer 12

My friend said this once:

In the name of the father, the son, and the holy spirit you are excommunicated. Now get the h**l out of my church!

Answer 13

When my friends dad made a new door for the living room and it wouldn't close properly

my mate said to his dad

"you cant make anything right can you"

And his dad replied straight away

"Well your walking proof of that"

I suppose wisdom does come with age!

Answer 14

it is better to die standing ....than to LIVE ON YOUR KNEE

che Guevara

Answer 15

2 lovers plan to suicide

The girl jump from the cliff with her eyes shut and says LOVE IS BLIND!

The boy follow her, jump from the cliff but then open his parachute and says LOVE NEVER DIES!

Answer 16

"Shitie Commitie" Lol

Answer 17

monkeeeey

Answer 18

haha

knock knock,

whos there?

smell mop

....

smell mop who?

ahahahahahahaha...

you said smell mah poo.......

random quotes you say?

its a good thing i have retarded friends....

wheres the bacon grease?!?!?

your pinky toe may as well not exsist.

Yeah well YOUR MOM,

you are my mom.

hey, does that cloud look really fuzzy to you?

But i wanted multiplicationnn flashcards!!!!

can you pick my wedgie?

IM A BEAR

but but but.. where will the golden sharpies go?

Is this my left hand?

oh sorry, my pants fall during the night.

whats your favorite pick up line?- do me.

knuckle touch!

yeah well, your grandma IS the toothfairy.

Answer 19

barthalamule? what your getting chased by a squirrel? (inside joke).

famous:

  i live in the great state of chicago!  (i forgot who said this)  

Dan Quayle - "I love California. I grew up in Phoenix."

Alicia Silverstone - "I think that the film "Clueless" was very deep. I think it was deep in the way that it was very light. I think lightness has to come from a very deep place if it's true lightness."

George Bush - "Too many obgyn's aren't able to practice their love with women across this country."

Arnold Schwarzanegger - "I think that g*y marriage is something that should be between a man and a woman."

Answer 20

It was really random. My friend Lois did something stupid so I joking called her "r****d" she laughed and said "no youre a r****d" and we kept it going for about 3-4rounds and then the microwave beeped and we both turned to look at it and she goes to say "no youre a r****d" again but because her mind was on the microwave she said "no youre a microwave...." i literally fell to the floor and was crying i was laughin so hard. She's a blonde btw, but shes really really intelligent, God works in mysterious ways intelligence but no common sense haha