What is up with people and their comments about bringing money and not gifts!!!!!?

Question

I need to vent so hear me out!! Who are these random people that come online and act as if they are above us all. it's all about the gift giving. No one asks you to bring money or a gift to their wedding. BUt it is customary and proper to bring a gift...i have NEVER EVER EVER gone to a wedding and thought to myself, gee let me not take a gift!! everytime we have taken money or something from the registry, but more than half of the time it's money. Who in the right and normal mind does that???YOU CANNOT ASK FOR A GIFT...obviously you are not asking for a gift or money, but if someone is asking a question about preferring money over gifts everyone is having a heart attack. CALM DOWN PEOPLE!! one person asks what they can say about preferring money, everyone goes crazy. If people don't register it's normal for people to bring money, WHAT IS THE BIG DEAL!!! ohhh it's soooooooooo rude, never ask for money! DUhhh!!Anyone come across these crazy women, who like to pretend they are on the high class etiquette role?Ugh they really really bug me!! Seriously if you don't agree don't write anything i don't want to read it

Answer 1

Personally, I don't see why people make a big deal about money and gifts. Yes it's true, they are equally nice to receive but why can't people just be thankful to be surrounded by all their friends and family who care about them and want to share in their big day? That's what it should be about. Not to mention, you're about to start a new life with someone you deeply care for. When you think of it that way why should it matter if you did or didn't get the dish set or whatever you wanted? Don't get me wrong, if someone wants to give a gift or money I don't see anything wrong with that, but at the same time they should never be made to feel like they absolutely HAVE to. Just my opinion.

Answer 2

This is a new way of doing things and  it puts  the traditionalists noses out of joint. Some of the regulars here are a fairly conservative bunch, basically if  some poor bride wants to do things differently, not the way  it was done  in their  mothers or grandmothers day then it's wrong and tacky.  A few months ago some poor bride  posted a  question about wanting a coloured wedding dress (she wanted to get married in red, her favourite colour) and was told by one of the respondents that a coloured dress would make her look like damaged goods! As if weddings weren't already a touchy subject  huh ?

Answer 3

Actually in many cultures money is preferred to gifts because there is a possibility of bad intention being attached to a gift (kind of like a curse) and some people have opted to ask for money because it is simply practical since they may have more than enough "stuff" and really need the funds to help with the honeymoon, home repair, debts or whatever. Patience with the Bride and Grooms desires is always proper etiquette. Good Luck!

Answer 4

I've noticed that on this board, especially in the Weddings sections, people only ask questions to get the answer that they want to hear.

If you don't agree with them than they find a way to justify their own opinion, no matter what.

Answer 5

wat are u talking about?!?!

my cousin is getting married in september an they asked on their invitation for a money donation isntead of a gift coz they already own a house etc

they hav everything they need so the money can go towards a honeymoon or something

wts ur problem

take a f*cking chill pill

Answer 6

Are you done?

What are you talking about?  Yes, it IS rude to ask for money.  Plain and simple.  Call me old-fashioned, call me a "crazy woman" if you want.  I didn't know simple manners ever went out of style.

I guess according to you they do.

If you are asking do I bring a gift to a wedding.  Yes, I do.  If I don't have time or feel like researching their registry, then I give a card with money.  

Yes, it is usually proper to bring a gift.

I have no idea about the rant or what provoked it.

Answer 7

<below is me not writing anything since I don't agree and you don't want to read it>

Answer 8

I think they are saying that you should be gracious and accept whatever gift someone decides to send. And, all gifts should be sent to the home of the bride before the wedding. Sorry, but there is logic there. This is done so that the couple does not have to worry about lost or stolen gifts or gifts that get separated from their cards. I'm sure you won;t like what I have to say but, if you think about what we're saying, it makes sense to care about other people's feelings. After all, I'm sure you're not hosting a wedding just to get gifts. I'll assume you're a couple in love who want to celebrate their union. Let's bring the focus back to what the wedding is all about people. Hint - it's NOT about gifts.