What is your favourite joke of all time?

Question

What is your favourite joke of all time?

Answer 1

An omish family go to a mall.

They are fascinated with the technology there.

There is a dad, mom, and two kids, a Boy and a girl.

The mom and girl go to the makeup department because it fascinates them.

The dad and the Boy go check out a large silver door in the wall that is very interesting. They see an old lady go in and lights above the door blink in one direction. The door opens and a very beautiful 20 year old woman comes out. The dad is barely able to utter the words "son, go get your mother, NOW!!!"

Answer 2

Bilingual Dog

A police dog responds to an ad for work with the FBI. "Well," says the personnel director, "You'll have to meet some strict requirements. First, you must type at least 60 words per minute."

Sitting down at the typewriter, the dog types out 80 words per minute.

"Also," says the director, "You must pass a physical and complete the obstacle course."

This perfect canine specimen finishes the course in record time.

"There's one last requirement," the director continues; "you must be bilingual."

With confidence, the dog looks up at him and says, "Meow!"

Answer 3

2 statues in a park.

god comes down n says do woteva u want for 10 minutes.

1 statue says to the other, "hold this ****** bird down while i **** on its head!"

Answer 4

A jelly baby went to an STD clinic because his willy was covered in coconut & liquorice.

The doc said, "What on earth have you been up to?"

He replied, "F**king Allsorts!"

Answer 5

a man lines up to run his first cross country marathon and sets off at a blistering pace three miles into the race he falls into a muddy bog up to his knees and cant get out a fellow runner passes and he shouts out"help can you get me out "the man looks round nobody to be seen and says"ill get you out if you suck my ****" "get lost" the man says ten minutes later and hes in up to his waist another runner passes and he asks again "get me out mate"the runner looks over and says "suck my **** and ill get you out"" ****off "the man says another couple of minutes passes and hes up  to his neck in mud another runner passes by he shouts over "get me out mate ill suck your**** for you "the runner comes over puts his foot on his head and says"get down you dirty *******"

Answer 6

Fella goes to a massage parlour?

gets undressed and lays down on the table. a s**y blond with fishnet

stockings and short skirt on walks in and starts to rub baby oil all

over him, after a few minutes she notices he is erect and ready so

she whispers in his ear would you like a w-ank, wow i sure would he says, so a few sconds later she leaves the room. so the guy is laying there waiting in anticipation for her to return, after about five or six minutes she pops her head around the door and says "are you finished yet"

Answer 7

The ones that Freddy Star, Lee Evens & Peter Kay come with