What is your point of view on the following?

Question

I'm married and have a son who is 14 months old. I would like to expand my family but i dont wish to have kids of my own. I would rather adopt. My husband would want the same. We are still young and I really want be ready and have a stable income. Knowing that there are many people in my family who would 100% hate me for adopting. Its a risk im willing to take. What would you do in my position?

Answer 1

i'm curious, why not have your own? are you considering foster care adoption or newborn adoption?

adoption is usually based on loss and i just don't see why anyone would enter into it, especially if they can have their own biological children.  and if your family has expressed apprehension, i'd be concerned about how the child you'd adopt will be treated by a family who doesn't embrace adoption.

i would really give this more thought...

Answer 2

I think that adoption is overall a great thing, but I don't think its fair to a child to bring them into a family full of hate.  It may be a risk you're willing to take for yourself, but it's not right to take that risk on behalf of the child.  They will be raised knowing that members of their family hate them for something that is beyond their control. Why would you subject an innocent child to that?

Answer 3

Follow your heart <3

Answer 4

I would be sure I lived at least 1,000 miles away from the people in my family who didn't support the adoption 100% and be sure my children did not spend even a moment with anyone of them..... Actually, that is what we did when we became aware of a non-supportive family member.

WE MOVED and do not go to their home for Dinner--parties or anything else.

Answer 5

find a privet family and adopted before they are sent into state aids yet be willing to have contact with the family which will be harder in a way but in the long run it is worth it because the children would know and even family members is another way- like my grand child my daughter passed away and father can not raise they were never married yet her father can see her if he wants to or even help in the support of her which is not done at this time but the point is she does know yet very happy here with her grandmother she is a a-b student in school very helpful to me so you see it's not only the adoptions but it is family best source.

Answer 6

I would adopt.  WTF is that about "there are many people in my family who would 100% hate me for adopting"??  You sound like you have some small-minded, judgemental family.  Move away if you have to.  If you have a loving home and can afford to, adopt.

Answer 7

How wonderful it is to know there are opened minded and big hearted people like yourselves. Because of you and your husband, a child will get a loving, wonderful home...a second chance for life.

Answer 8

Go for it- you desire to give a home to a child that needs one- how could your family hate you for this?  Oh yeah, I remember when my hubby and I adopted our 2 children, his family was against it- actually I am adopted as well, and they thought "I could not know what love is because I was abandoned by my birth mom" - WRONG- If you and your husband feel like adoption is the right road to go down , go for it- your family will come around, and even if they don't you and your husband are the beginning of a new family. Hang in there, and go for it, if this is what you think is best for you.

Answer 9

There are tons of unloved, uncared for children in this world. Why would anyone you know be opposed to you adopting? I've never heard of such a thing. You are kind enough to open your home to another child and show him love. Please, do so. I wouldn't worry about what other people say because that child will say the nicest of things to you when you love him.

The only thing I can imagine is that you meant to write "you really WON'T be ready or have a stable income." If that's the case, talk to someone to get your finances in order. It actually takes less time than you'd think. Most people put it off because they're afraid.

If you have the chance to love another child, do it.

Answer 10

most of my family is completely against adoption as well. an aunt adopted two children that she thought were healthy and they both ended up haveing many health problems and biologically caused behavioral children. but that said, they are both now married and productive people. it wasn't easy to raise them, but the adoptive parents still loved them and managed everything alright.

i still plan on taking the risk of adopting children. if both you and your husband want to adopt, you should! it may not be easy, but it will almost certaintly be worth it. i would simply suggest waiting for that stable income.

Answer 11

Yes- you and your husband are wonderful people. Giving a child a life that it deserves makes you better people than most out there! My hat is off to you!

www.kfh.org

Answer 12

You sound like you have a lot of love in your heart to give to a child and with so many out there that need a home and would benefit from being part of your little family who cares what your family would think? Take the risk it would be your family members that will have to deal with their own personal issues, don't even let that affect you....