What kind of parenting style causes a social dictator?

Question

My 7 year old is so bossy with her playmates, she always makes up rules, she always wants to be first, she always wants to pick the song to dance to, etc. The playmates don't seem to mind much (maybe one out of ten times). I know part of it is her personality, but what is it about our parenting that may also be contributing to this?

Answer 1

I think being too authoritarian or being too permissive can cause that.

I have no clue what you're doing... but I always learned that being authoratative is best.  Teach them, talk at their level, teach them empathy, caring, etc.

Make sure they know that they are part of a group, a family, that their needs are important but so are everyone else's.

Answer 2

parenting styles do not necessarily CAUSE a child's personality. You can have a disciplinarian parent with two kids, and those two kids could turn out completely different. You have to take into account the child's natural temperament as well.

Answer 3

~Sounds like a lot of kids....this is very normal.  All kids want to be the boss, they always want to win, they want to be first picked.....it really is personality of the child and parenting styles can't change that much...

Answer 4

They actually performed a study on just his subject. It was found that kids raised in a democracy style household, where the parent takes an active role in their lives, and guides them, but where the kids take part in decision making processes and are allowed to express their opinions and work towards change, tend to grow up to be good leaders.

They learn how to nurture others' strengths, and become fair and effective leaders.

Kids raised with either of the "extremes" (laissez-faire, where the parent does very little, and is fairly uninvolved, and authoritarian, where the parent is over controlling or overbearing) tend to be less effective leaders, and also tend to fall to an extreme, where they either micromanage the other's around them, or don't know how to do anything at all as far as leadership, and leave the others to flounder.

I don't know if this is the case with your child, but I just thought I'd share one point of view. Good luck, and if you talk to your daughter, and encourage her to share the role of leader, she will grow out of this stage. Just remember to listen to her and treat her as a person.