What should I do, where should I go?

Question

I am 14 and my two parents have divorced when I was age 4. My dad went to the city and my mom bought a house in the suburbs...However my dad moved closer to my mom and then eventually into my town which he claims is for the sole reason of being with us. He works in foreign currency exchange, which is a very volatile business. He has also recently opened an office in New York City, Japan, and is planning on opening one in Hong Kong. He also recently broke up with his girlfriend ...As you can see, he is in a great amount of stress. I see him once a while and he gets very mad, upset, and disappointed when our plans are broken. It turns out he gave the house my brother, my mother and I now live in to my mother. She apparently did not handle the money well so she gave it back to my dad, who paid off her debt and gave her the house back when everything was paid off. Regardless of what is stated on the divorce agreement, the house is still in his name. He often has a short temper and when he gets mad he doesn't talk to me and my brother for some days. However, I almost understand why he gets angry. He now wants me to live with him. I feel that I may have a better opportunity with him. He tells me there will be more responsibility on my part. This also means that my mom will only receive half of the money my dad pays her now. If I do decide to live with him, he tells me that he will buy a two story house (be lives in a one story rented house) in the same town. I will still be able to visit my mom almost daily. He and I are also planning on creating a t-shirt making business.

My mom says that it is ok, but she is afraid that he will change like he usually does and become made at me. Most of the time when he ets really mad he does because plans are unintentionally broken (which look like my mom trying to keep me away from him, but that isn't the case). I don't think my mom wants me to live with him and I don't know if it's because of the money, or that fact that I will no longer live with her...I'd hate to see her upset...

Anyone have any suggestions?

Answer 1

You shouldn't have to know any but the most basic of the financial part of either of your parents lives. It sounds like you have a real interest in living with your Dad and if you think that you will be happy then why not give it a try/ don't worry about your mom's finances. The support your dad pays is for your care and so it follows that if you aren't living there then she doesn't have those expenses. It is her responsibility to take care of her bills. you will be able to see her often but, may have a more stable life with your dad. don't feel guilty about wanting to give it a try. Good luck I hope things work out for you. do you have a counselor at school or are you part of a church or have a trusted adult or responsible friend that you can talk to about these issues? if not try to find one.

Answer 2

Your dad sounds like hes bribing you.

I would play it safe with your mum.

Come on?

T-shirt making business? if it ever happens, i bet

you anything your dad will pocket the profits.

Who cares how big his house is?

Nothing compares to your mums love, and care for you.

at least you know she doesn't have a temper.