Hi - please read my story. Here's the condensed version - I studied to sing/dance/act as a musical theatre performer (tenor) for several years. I got nowhere auditioning for about 2 years. I was about to give up when I met this guy who encouraged me to sing as a countertenor upon hearing me sing "Mary Sunshine" from the musical "Chicago." So, I got myself a full scholarship to a college and studied as a countertenor for two years. Upon graduating, I was offered a spot in MSM's graduate voice program (Manhattan School of Music) - no too shabby, eh? - and auditions from University at Buffalo (SUNY) and Curtis Institute. I was accepted also in U at B and went there on nearly full scholarship. I was lonely and frustrated living there on my own, having been from NYC all my life, with no hardly anyone around and not happy with the poorly funded, bare-bornes production they were mounting as a showcase for the voice department. I left at the beginning of the second semester, just left emails and bounced out of town. Very scandalous.
So, I went back home and started temping at a bank. Stayed there for about 8 months, all the while hoping to get into some young artist programs with opera companies (they're like intern/apprenticeships). But, all the people I worked with while I was in school doing my undergraduate work didn't want to recommend me because they hadn't heard me in a while and were being very stand-offish. I began going online at work and going onto porno sites and got myself involved in some child p**n sting and ended up doing 2 years in prison and 3 years probation. I just finished probation very succesfully, and just finished watching a compilation of Natalie Dessay's greatest opera roles and have been practicing and realize I really still love singing. I hadn't performed locally in churches or anything while I was in school, it was really by the Gods that I was good and talented enough to get invited to audition for those schools (and also invited to audition for Houston Grand Opera's young artist program during that time, but opted not to because of a scare from an otolaryngologist that I had nodes-which was just phlegm, btw, and they read the scope photos incorrectly).
Are there any classical/opera singers out there who have quit or taken a rest or in general who love singing and have had careers and know my anguish? I know I was dumb with the whole p**n thing. Please don't harp on that. I am a good person and have failed at so many things - have hardly any friends now, always had difficulty finding lovers, and had to give up my greatest love, music, for years and years and now want to venture out again. I'm like 100 lbs heavier but still have quite a voice and I'm only 32 but in the opera world that's not SO old. Please tell me ur thoughts.
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