What should I do about a boy who is constantly picking on my boy?

Question

My boy is well liked and funny and has a great group of friends. He is new to his school this year (3rd grade) and there is one boy that is determined to pick on him about everything. They are in the same class and up until now it has been hurtful things that are said and arguments about who is better at drawing, what t.v. shows are better, picking on the things my child likes and general mean comments. Today the child punched my boy during a disagreement. My son and a group of onlookers went to the teacher, but I never got a phone call from the school. Last winter something similar happened with different children and despite evidence to the contrary, my child got in trouble (temporarily-the other kids finally told the truth). But it bothers me that my child was called to the disciplinarian and I got a phone call, but this boy is only being spoken to and it is ongoing. Because it is the same child, I would like to meet with the parents. Any advice for me or what I should say??

Answer 1

"It looks like our two are not getting along, I am concerned and my child is getting worried.....what shall WE do to make things better?"

Or

Speak to the school and ask them to keep an eye on the situation as you are very concerned that this boy is bullying your son - this is probably the best approach to start with. If it is true then the school can speak to his parents and deal with the backlash rather than you.

Some children take great delight in making others lives difficult and punching is assault in this day and age - please, don't let this naughty boy get away with it!

Answer 2

Tell them you heard that their son was picking on your son. Tell them how upset he is.

Answer 3

Have a meeting with the principal. Your child is being bullied and the school is not protecting him.

Discuss what your child has been telling you about the bully and state that you want to be informed by the school if he hurts your child again.

After this meeting, if it appears that nothing is being done, request a meeting again and this time mention "legal action if necessary." If that doesn't get their attention, then carry out your threat.

Answer 4

First of all, be polite. I know you probably already knew that, but a lot of parents can feel like their parental abilities are being attacked if you confront them about their children. So, be very polite and tell them what you told us. Tell them about the problem, and hopefully those parents are reasonable, and you can work together for a solution. Maybe you can suggest that they talk to their child about the situation.

Answer 5

I would talk to the child's parents or the teacher. Send the parents a note telling them what the child did. Also let the teacher know that you are upset by this and don't want it to happen again. This child needs to know that it is not OK to do this to people. I hope this helped.

-Tara

Answer 6

tell the boys mother

Answer 7

Yes, I would want to talk to the parents.  I would say something like it seems like our boys haven't been getting along so well.  I'd like to hear about your son's perspective of what the problem is so we can figure out a good solution.  I have been trying to teach my son conflict resolution and I am having a hard time with the limited info I am getting

Answer 8

I don't condone violence but my son was in the same situation in kindergarten, we went to school several times and nothing seemed to work, the little monster even destroyed my son's clothing, so finally after the school would do nothing about it, my son starting fighting back, sometimes with bullies, especially kids with bad home lives, they only respond to getting into trouble, after my son, who is bigger than this bully, knocked him down and laughed at him a few times, it stopped completely, isn't that what we used to do in school, we had our fights and took care of things ourselves, more children need to be less timid about bullying, I taught my son that sometimes you have to stoop to people's levels even if it isn't always kosher, I also have let him know that he will never get into trouble for defending himself.

Answer 9

Tell your child to avoid the people he has conflicts with, and to ignore them and not respond in any way if they say mean things to him.  They will eventually give up.  Try not to show that you're getting invovled; kids usually get picked on even more for that.

Answer 10

I would have a seroius talk with the teacher. If he's the one that causes the fights u got to let the teacher know that. Get your sons side of the story and share it with the teachers.