What should I do if my high school class doesn't think I should have been valedictorian?

Question

I had always worked hard and been at the top of my class but took my junior year as a foreign exchange student. When I came back and class ranks were in, I was the valedictorian, but a lot of my class doesn't think I deserve it because of my year out of the US.

What makes this more complicated is that on one of those facebook groups "You know you're part of the class of 2008 when...", one of them was "You were pissed when you found out Peter was valedictorian." A third of my class of several hundred students have already joined this group.

Ok, I have some very good friends, but I've never been regarded as popular outside of that, even though I'm very outgoing and involved with stuff. Now, I have to give a speech in June in front of this class that practically hates me.

What can I make my speech about? I just want to be respected, not as valedictorian, but just as a person. How do I do this?

Ugh, I need help to get through the next 5 months. Thanks for your responses!

Answer 1

You can either totally rock it with something profound.

Or you can be really cheeky and talk about how success is obtained by tolerance.

Answer 2

Wow, that's tough. Unfortunately, many people who shouldn't get valdedictorian do soley because they were the most popular (even if they weren't a good student, they went out partying the most behind teacher's backs, maybe cheated to get their grades, whatever.) In this case, it sounds like you're the person who should get it, but no one wants you to because you're not "popular." I can totally empathize with you on this.

First of all, WHATEVER happens (and I know this is easier for me to say than for you to feel, but) just know that whatever the boo-hooers think doesn't matter. The fact is, you, your friends, your family, probably at least several of the students in your class, and your teachers and school faculty all know you deserve it.

Now *sigh* I know what you're facing is a very real situation, and if I were in it, I'd be freaking out just like you. You probably think it's almost worse you're still valedictorian and have to give a speech when people are less than supportive about that than if they'd just convinced the school to let them pick someone else. At least then you could be pissed about it and not have to face the humiliation of what you're going to say to all of them now.

Well, since I don't know you or your school personally, I'll have to be a little vague, but what I would do is give a speech on the things that are important to all of your class--specifically to your class of 2008. Things that couldn't apply to the grades before or after. Of course, things that apply to the school in general--to all classes--should also be included. But try to personalize your speech, make it nostalgic, win the hearts of your classmates by giving them something they can all relate to (whatever your approach is--by making them laugh about silly things that have happened to various classmates through the years, by breaking their hearts talking about some of the tragedies...but the point is, make yourself -their- representative, so they can't help but love you at the end. I really hope that helps. Just let "the spirit" guide you, and go with it. Don't chicken out on everything you've prepared once you're up there.

Demand their attention and respect, and that's what you'll get. :)

Answer 3

There's no way to make unreasonable people respect you, buddy. But know that you probably deserve to be valedictorian. Obviously your grades at the school you attend were high enough before and after you did your exchange. So those three years prove that you're a good student.

As far as your exchange, I'll tell you this for reassurance, not so you can tell your classmates: unless you did an exchange to a poor country, you probably worked harder in a foreign school than any U.S. student will ever know.

Let's be honest ... the U.S. system lacks.

Answer 4

Don't worry about the "talk". Just continue to be a good student. Your speech could be about the future, or planning for the future, or what its like to leave home for an education (based on your junior year experience), etc.

Answer 5

Ain't jealously wonderful...

To be honest, that has probably always happened, especially if some of your closest rivals were particularly popular. It's just that with the advent of facebook it's easier for people to discuss it with one another, and then the sheep mentality kicks in. I'm afraid that you're suffering from the latest "it's cool to hate..." clique. By June I suspect that a large number of those sudents will be at least secretly embarrassed about signing up to it.

Did you force people to make you valedictorian? Do anything remotely inappropriate to influence them? No? Then ignore it and be proud of your achievements. And I would base your speech on the principle that being valedictorian wasn't and isn't your aim, it's merely a side-effect of working hard and getting good results. Don't even mention the group, no matter how tempting it may be to take a couple of sideswipes at it.

They didn't want you to win? They should have worked harder and got better results than you, then. Grit your teeth, hold your head up high, and if people try to draw you out, say "yes, I've seen the group, they're entitled to their opinion." They'll rapidly discover once they hit college that nobody in the real world has any time at all for the "boo hoo it's not fair" brigade.

Answer 6

Perhaps you could start your speech talking about the expectations of life, respect, humility and why it is important not to pre-judge a people.

In high school it's a "popularity contest."  The ones that are most deserving in High school usually lose to the "hot shots" with the pretty faces that don't deserve the prize.  But that's why it is high school.  It is not the real world.

In the real world (which you will face soon), people are judged by their performance, not by their popularity.

Don't bother yourself with the opinions of your fickle classmates.  

Most likely you earned this position.  You should not have to apologize to anyone about it.  

It sounds like you were always a part of your class and school even overseas and earned the title from all your hard work.

Hold your head high when you make your speech, but be humble.  If you are as wise as I think you are, then give a humble yet stirring speech to prepare your classmates for the real world to come.

Answer 7

Step aside.  The benefits are legion:

1)  They can't hold it against you.

2)  It'll show up on your transcript anyhow.

3)  You don't have to worry about making a speech.

4)  You don't have a*****e classmates breathing down your neck.

Is the battle really worth fighting?

Answer 8

Come again? 'Woe is me, I'm being forced to be valedictorian.' That's your story? Forgive me for not feeling your pain. There's people in the world with real problems. Respect yourself. You can't control what other people are going to think about you.

You know what I remember about the speech of my class' valedictorian? Nothin'. You can console yourself that it really doesn't matter at all what you choose to speak about.  5 minutes after your speech is over no one will care about or remember what you said.

Answer 9

Don't even address the jealousy of the students who lost out to you.  Talk about the future, hope, and optimism.  If you don't play into their hands, they will respect and admire you!

Answer 10

Imagine if you were in an elective office (as opposed to one of merit) and you got 50.1% of the popular vote (some 38,500,000 votes out of 75,000,000). This means that NOT only does 38,500,000 people hate you (the current position of all voters whose candidate did not win) but also the balance of the country's non-voting population. this means that you wil have to govern the country with some 263,000,000 peopl that either hate you or did not think enough of you one way or the other to come out to vote.

It AIN'T a popularity contest, and unlike Political conventions, after the blood has been spilled on the floor in an attemt to nominate someone to carry the party banner, you can't go back and poll the conventioneers to gain a post election unanamous vote of solidarity.

Of ALL of the people in your class, YOU have, by merit, come to the top of the class. This is an OBJECTIVE status, NOT a subjective one. To all of those who would disagree with the numbers, remember this, they FAILED to measure up in a race were all were on equal ground. That is not your failure, but rather your triumph.

You are going to have to get more sun in your life and develope a thicker skin. Life is NOT a popularity contest, but rather an arena for winners and losers.

IF you are NOT a winner then you are a loser. Seems you have worked too hard to shuck the symbol of the merits of your efforts for some niave and juvinile concept of "can't we all get along".