What should I do in this [potentially SUPER awkward] situation?

Question

I had a freeloading, cheap-skate, mooching roommate who did everything I did, said everything I said and even dated my bf's twin brother for a minute. Needless to say, the friendship is no more. We argued, cursed at each other, and now we just don't speak. Fine.

She dated a guy about...3 or 4 years ago. They were together for the space of about 3 months. She was living with him at his mom's house (this is like sophomore year of college) and it ended when he came home and found her having s*x with another guy...in his bed.

Back to the present now. The same guy and I rekindled our friendship over the past 2 years or so. I like him...a lot. And I'm pretty sure he likes me back. The awkward part is that my moochy ex-roommate is still obsessed with him [even though she's getting married to someone else]. Shows up at his job, calls, e-mails, etc. The job thing as recently as a few weeks ago. The guy is just amazing really. And I'd love to date him, but I really don't want to have to deal with this other b*tch again.

What should I do?

Answer 1

First talk to her and consult with your boyfriend. your boyfriend (if he loves you) should accept to cut his relationship with her and he should tell her not to contact him.

Second if she persists, try to change the phone number, block her email address and so on.

Third, if she continue to harass, your boyfriend should seek help from police.

Answer 2

I think that before you start a relationship with him, he needs to send a clear message to your old roommate if he wants nothing to do with her:  

-he can block her email so none of her emails will get through

-at work tell his co-workers, security people at his job, HR, etc. at his job that he does not want to see her and she is not a welcome visitor

-block her number so she cannot contact him

-let his apt. building know she is not a welcome visitor

This might sound a bit drastic, but I was in a similar situation once.  My boyfriend was trying to be nice, let her down easy, maybe keep friendship a possibility, but she was obsessively calling, texting, etc.  And while my boyfriend will never admit it (!), I think a small part of him was extremely flattered that this girl - albeit a wacko! - was so obsessed with him!

I think once your ex-roommate is out of the picture, it will allow both you and him to pursue a romantic relationship.  Good luck!

Answer 3

The ex sounds like a psycho....it is up to the two of you to severe contact with her.  You are perfectly free to date this guy given the amount of time that has passed and at this point he should just tell her in no uncertain terms to stop contacting him even if it means changing email addresses, and his cell phone number.  She is engaged to another man and shouldn't be harassing him.  I'm afraid at least for the short term you will have to deal with her since she doesn't seem to get the hint to leave this guy alone.  Be careful...she sounds like she is not playing with a full deck!

Answer 4

the ex-roommate is a BlTCH  do what u want and stay away from the ex-roommate

Answer 5

She's nuts. But if you want a to see where this might be going take it as a good time to learn how to let things roll off your back. Help him figure out a way to block her calls,etc.

It will help build trust too.