What should I do when I have a really good friend that is a really bad host?

Question

For example, since its summer right now, she likes to invite me a lot to her house for like...say 4 or 5 hours.

And every time she invites me, its usually during a lunch or dinner period.

So I go to her house and say this time she invited me from 4-8. We go play wii, go online, do other stuff. And during this 4 hour period, she offers me NO DRINK, NO FOOD, nothing. O_O

I find it really weird because I offered her everything in my house when I invited her. And she ate like 2 plates of spaghetti and drank one soda.

And this is like everytime I go to her house. One time I asked her, "What's to eat?" and she's like uh...you can have those skittles...@_@

And her parents are home 24/7. And its weird because none of them eat at ALL when i'm there. Is it like they want to eat when I leave? Why can't they just offer me a drink or food? Are they that cheap? Please help and give me advice so I can go through this next time I go to her house -___- [which trust me, will be soon...]

Answer 1

If she isn't calling you up to say, "Please come over for the day and have dinner with us," then you aren't being invited for a meal.  That's your first clue.

Next time she asks you to come over, and you know you'll be there during a meal time, go ahead and ask her - "Hey, girlfriend, you know that's during (lunch/supper/whatever).  Are we going to be eating at your house, or do I need to plan to come back home for meals?"  If she says that no, my mom isn't planning to feed you, then you can tell her that instead of coming over at 11 (for example), you'll be over around 12:30 or 1:00, AFTER you've had lunch.

Something that you may not realize is that different families eat meals at wildly different times.  My dad was raised in the country.  To him, breakfast should be eaten before 6:30 am, lunch is finished and cleaned up before noon, supper is at 4:30.  If he invited you to come over to his and Mom's house on Saturday at 6 pm to watch a movie, he doesn't mean come over at 6 and expect a meal just because you're accustomed to eating dinner at 6:30 or 7:00.  

Your friend's family may be accustomed to eating their meals at very different times from what you're used to, and if so, it will never occur to them that their guests might be hungry.  On the other hand, your friend's mom just might be a really lousy cook and she doesn't want to embarrass herself by feeding an outsider something she cooked.  Or your friend's family may eat a lot of tv dinners and take-out foods and either they're embarrassed for you to find that out or they just don't want to spend the money on an extra meal.

There are a lot of reasons why the family is funny about food.  So since you know this, it's up to you to clear it up before you ever go over there.  Your friend needs to know that YOUR family eats its meals at certain times, and your visits to her house are going to have to be worked around your family's meal times.

Answer 2

Maybe they can't afford it? Or maybe they're afraid you won't like what they have to offer?

Why don't you just ask your friend about it? You said she's your good friend, you should be able to talk about these things.

Good luck!