What should I do with my ex?

Question

I have been single for 9 months. I have 2 kids with my ex boyfriend. We was together for 5 years.

Well, we broke up because he called me names all the time... He also hit me a couple of time. He drinks allot... He never bought stuff for the kids like what they needed. He would get paid and go straight to the bar and drink drink.

When we broke up he called me names. Like I was lazy, a b*tch, a user. And I told him all I wanted you to do is take care of your kids like a real man should. And he hit me in my face and blacked my eye. And I ended up calling the police and he got arrested for hitting me and I threw him out and haven't seen him since.

Well, he called me the other day saying that he wanted to see the kids. And even asked me if I would take him back and when I told him no. He just kept on and on with the name calling and he told me that I wouldn't find another man because of the kids. And that he is the only person that would ever be with me. And that made me think.

And I was wondering if I should stay single and wait for the right person to come into my life or should I take him back for the sake of my kids.

Answer 1

God, no, don't take him back!!!  He will hurt you again.  And again.  Don't let him near you or the kids.  He might hurt the kids or take off with them to "punish" you.  Go to court and get a restraining order.  Just tell the judge about all the past abuse and how he has recently re-contacted you and you are in fear.  If he shows up, call the cops.  Has he been paying child support?  Is there a court order for child support?  Since he has not been visiting with the kids, I doubt it.  you should get that, too.

Answer 2

Re-read your letter and ask that question again--NO do not take him back- hes a beater(physically and mentally) and a drinker and a LOSER! If he wants to see the kids, only with supervision, but not you-he'll play you! Get a relative (MALE whose on your side) to supervise. This way, he cant convince the kids to talk you into taking him back, if hes drunk-visit's over right now and your ex wont fight him, he wont lay a hand on them or you when you tell him to go to h**l when he tries to charm you back. There are guys who dont mind kids-but you have to be careful! Ive raised my kids (4 of them) by myself and am cautious about men--If I tell a guy I have 4 kids and he doesnt run, hmmmm what does he want? Most guys (who dont run) are ok but keep your eyes open- pedophiles are in jail because they got caught and look on the Internet to see if they have a record. For now-work on yourself and your kids happiness and your ex isnt it. You and your kids are the most important lives in your world and letting someone back like that will only teach them its ok to hit woman or be hit by a man and take it. Break the cycle. He wants to bring you down to his level-you dont need a man right now. Stay single till you meet the right person who'll do right by you and the kids.

Answer 3

DON'T TAKE HIM BACK... have some dignity...you may think you need him for your kids...but what if he ever tried to hurt one of the children...and then you would have to kill him...and you don't want to see him dead do you... he WAS'NT the right guy and i'm sure the right guy would love you and your children.Try a taking it to court

Answer 4

do not take him back for what he done to you he hit you in the face that is not right and he is alcoholic all he cares about is booze not you and the kids there is some one better than him out there you sounds like a very nice person and hard working mother don't talk to him not worth of your time you can find some one way better then him what a d**k for hitting you in the face i'm a guy and i would not do nothing like that specially hitting a women in the face