What should I say to him about this? Please help me

Question

I am 7 months of pregnancy and live in another country. Father of my son is USA citizen, I am mexican. Since he leave my country (6 months ago) he´s been saying he will be back to married me. He says he can´t back now because is waiting insurance pays him for an accident in ex job he had before coming live with me a year ago. There is always an excuse for not be payed and it´s been almost a year and he is not been payed yet. He has no job at USA because he says builders are not working because the economy so he has not send any help for me and baby, now he says he wants to come back my country and live with me (in my home) but I feel he wants somebody supports him. (actually he lives with his sister) Don´t know what to do, I told him I can´t support him here because I am going to have my baby in 2 months and I am not working right now so have to save cash till I can back work. He don´t trust on me and he say I am cheating on him and that´s why I don´t wanna he backs to live with me. He´s 49 years old and I am 24 and I feel he is irresponsible to be part of me and my baby´s life.

Also feel little sad because all pregnancy I have been alone.

What do you think I should do about this or say to him? I don´t want to be sad no more and just want be happy because my baby is coming soon.

Answer 1

Tell him that you feel it is best that he doesn't bother coming back to live with you.

It seems he'll just be a burden.

Suerte

Answer 2

As a counselor, I have experience in working on relationship issues.  You have to decide what kind of man you want in your life and whether building a relationship with him will be healthy for you and your baby.  What do you want in a partner/husband?  Does he have all of the qualities you desire?  If he remains like he is, are you willing to deal with that indefinitely (like, are you willing to support him if he never works)?  Talk with him about what you would like for the relationship to be like and what you need from him as well as what you are willing to give.  In a healthy relationship, there should be equal giving and taking so that no-one feels like they are being used or taken advantage of.  What limit are you willing to set with him?  What would make you happy?  Just some things to think about in talking with him.

Answer 3

This guy is a loser. 25 years older than you and wants to be a freeloader.

I live in the USA and there are jobs here, even if it's just McDonald's he could have found something by now. He sounds like he is just making excuses and if he is almost 50 he won't stop this behavior.

I think you are right he wants someone to support him and I feel bad that you've been used this way but you will be happier by having no more contact with him.

Good luck

Answer 4

He is full of lies and has been lying to you for a while.  He obviously doesnt care about you and you need to decide if he is someone you want and can trust to help you with your baby.  You know in your heart what the right answer is, dont hope for him to be someone hes not.  Do what you know is right for you and your baby

Answer 5

Dejalo mujer.  

Es mejor estar sola que mal acompañada.

Your young and can take care  of your baby. That guy should've stepped up to the plate. At least he could've been with you since you were pregnant and shown his support.