What should I say to the child or the Parant?

Question

I babysitt a 5 year old girl in my home. She lives with her grandmother and mother. All of my dealings have been with the grandmother. ( she works with my husband ) The child has been raised on the idea that she is ALWAYS right... I cant help but feel it is disrespect to me. The lady has asked me to please keep my Apt. Warmer. I keep the thermostat on 74... I live in Central Florida... I think that is a fine temp but her child complains of being cold. Yesterday the child and I were watching tv and a commerical came on with an african american little boy singing and the child said... "" I dont like black people "" I turned off the tv and asked her why and she said "" I dont like their skin"" I told her she should love everyone and they are no different then anyone else and that God loves everyone. She told me that her grandma doesn't like them... I "" not knowing what to say "" Was very firm and said YOUR GRANDMOTHER IS WRONG. what do I say? (( we also have a prob. with payment too"

Answer 1

The way to get to adults (not saying you aren't one, you didn't post your age), or "elders," really is to make them feel ridiculous without actually being a b**** to them. (I work at an employment agency, and I'm great at it!) I would calmly and in a very soft, loving voice explain to the grandmother or mother how concerned you are over the child's lack of consideration for others. Use that term, too: "lack of consideration!" Give the parent/guardian specific examples, like the one you described about black people and list how this could become problematic as she grows older. I would also mention that you feel she is being raised in an environment where ignorance about race is present. Be sure to say ignorance and not stupidity though!! As far as payment, tell them you will not keep her until payment is caught up. I know your boyfriend works with the grandmother, but friends is friends, business is business!!

Answer 2

I wouldn't tell a child that their family member is wrong.  This sets up a power struggle.  I would tell the child that I am sure that you misunderstood then confront the grandmother about it.  I would say something to the grandma like this child seems to think that you don't like black people and that you want her to not like them either.  And that I am sure that she misunderstood, noone wants a 5 yo discriminating.  This is more likely to change the grandma's behavior esp. in front of the 5 yo. and if you put her on the spot she will nearly have to back peddle and recant the racism

Answer 3

this is their child and you are "the baby sitter". not the parent.people can choose to raise their kids how they like.it might be wrong,but you dont have a say.if u dont like it then dont sit no more,easy as that.its not your choice.

Answer 4

If I were you I would first decide if babysitting her is really worth your while, if yes then do your best to show her all the different people,religions,and ways of life out there. It is a big job but if her family is not going to do this it will fall to someone to teach her that no matter how anyone looks,talks,or prays it is how the world has become the great place of "ONE" that it has.

Good Luck.

Answer 5

to put racist ideas in a childs mind when she is too young to understand what she is saying is terrible.

tell this despicable woman to get another baby sitter.

Answer 6

Explain to the child that in your presence such talk will not be tolerated. It may or not work, however you will feel better.  Then I would speak to her grandmother and state it again. If the job is not working out look for something else.

Answer 7

Easy answer is stop babysitting.

If you need to continue ask grandmother to dress child in warmer clothes or to put a cardigan or sweater in her bag.

I wouldn't say g/m is wrong just say "I believe such and such".