What should be the appropriate age difference between 2 kids?

Question

I am married for last 3 years and my daughter is 18 months.Now I am pregnant again and by the time the new baby comes my daughter will be 27 months.I was very happy with the pregnancy but when I shared the news with my sister and sister in law they jus discouraged me and not even congratulated me.Saying that Oh that early again?First time I was pregnant after 9 months of my marriage.My happiness is all gone because of this and I can't even share this issue with my husband.Is it actually that early?Please advice.

Answer 1

You know what?  There is no "appropriate age difference" or "rule" that states when to have your next child.  You have kids when you have kids.  End of story.  What difference does it make if the age difference between your children is 1 yr to 10 yrs.  If you are able to bear children and you are not at risk due to health issues, then be happy that you are pregnant with your second child.  Honestly, I think your sister and sister-in-law are just either jealous and they are both trying to take away your joy of being pregnant.  Also, from the sounds of it they do not have children themselves so they don't understand that age differences between children don't matter.  I myself have 3 siblings.  The age gap between my two older sisters and me is 7 and 9 years apart and the difference in age between my younger sister and I is just 11 months, not even a year!!!  So I'm telling you, it doesn't matter what the age difference is between siblings.  Just enjoy the fact that you are pregnant and you are going to give your first child a younger sister or brother.

Answer 2

If you can't be happy in this situation, I'd question whether you can be happy in any situation. Real happiness does not come from external circumstances.

Regardless, you should definitely share what you're feeling with your husband, though don't expect it to make any difference in your external circumstances. We really have very little control over a lot of things, including when we get pregnant, so take what comes. Believe me, many of us wish we could have more kids and biologically cannot. That's not a fun situation to be in either. Again, happiness has to come from the inside, not outside.

Contact me personally if you want to talk more.

Answer 3

Two years is more than enough time!  My sister and I are 20 months apart!  My  brother is 17 months from my sister, and my OTHER brother is two years away from my brother, so I mean any age is appropriate!

My Kids:

Lydia-7

Nick-3

Caralyn- 2 months, 3 days, 16 hours, 49 minutes

Eliot- 2 months, 3 days, 16 hours, 44 mintues

Answer 4

Don't let anyone make you feel unhappy about your pregnancy. It is a wonderful thing. My children are only 20 months apart (my son is almost 21 months and my daughter is 3 weeks old) and I wouldn't change it for the world. 27 months difference is fine. The kids will be fine and so will you. People have kids even sooner than that. My older sister and I are 13 months apart and my youngest sibling and I are 17 YEARS apart, so there is no such thing as too early or too late in my eyes. Be happy for the child on the way and don't worry what anyone else thinks. Congrats on the new baby!

Answer 5

Your sisters are being silly.  2 years apart is just right.  You won't have to be changing 2 diapers at once.  My mom had me 11 months after she married, my brother 1 year 4 months after me, and my second brother 1 year 3 weeks after that.  She said we were all happy accidents, but she wouldn't want to have to go though having 2 kids in diapers at once, and bottles for everyone again.

Personally, I plan to have my second child right after the first, because I really liked being so close in age to my brothers.

Your kids will probably be good friends.

Answer 6

Don't feel bad about this because your kids will have the opportunity to actually grow up together. I think that you have a good bit of difference between your kids. Your kids will be born 27 months apart ( 2 years, 3 months) mine will be born 14 months apart ( 1 year 2 months). So, I think that you got the longer end of the stick!! Congrats!

Answer 7

Whatever.  Don't listen to them.  There is no "appropriate" age difference between children -- each family decides what is right for them.  My brother and I are 25 months apart, and my husband's brother is 12 years younger than him, and both are perfectly normal, perfectly happy families!  If anyone says anything to you, just say "oh, does it seem soon?  The timing felt right to us and we're thrilled to be expecting again".  They'll get the message.  

Congrats!  

Answer 8

Its not up to them, ignore the rudeness and be happy about your new blessing!!  

Answer 9

Oh I wouldn't worry hun! That was really rude of them to say! I think it completely depends on the parents. It's totally a preference issue. Personally, I'm going to space mine out 2-3 years. But, a friend of mine got pregnant w/ her second a month after she had her first. Her reasoning was...if you're going to be dealing w/ diapers, bottles, etc., why not just knock it all out at once. I'd rather enjoy my son for a while before having another. You will be fine. Once your new baby is here, you really won't know any different! Just be happy and enjoy it...every baby is a blessing!

Answer 10

I think you sister/sister in law shouldn't have said that. If this is what makes you happy, then they should be happy for you.

I am an only child but I would say a year or two.

congrats!

Answer 11

Its not that small of a gap. I have a friend whose younger brother was born in the same year as she was- so he's only like 10 months younger or so.

Answer 12

Well, Im a twin, so I don't exactly know.

My cousins are four years apart, so that might be a good place to start.

-Muglebee

Answer 13

Who cares....My kids are almost exactly 2yrs apart...and my in-laws are Mexican and they were pissed...but I was married for 4yrs before first baby and they were still mad...now my sill was only married for like 3 months and got pregnant...baby will be here right after their 1yr anniversary and they barly dated 1yr and went to MX to get married and the family is over the moon about it! Go figure huh!

Answer 14

I wouldnt care what other people think i know ppl with kids 1 year apaprt! lol just do what makes you happy. i would tell my sis "yeha this early. Got a problem?"

Answer 15

Your married and paying for everything on your own I wouldn't give a s*it what they had to say. To be honest I think having kids about a year after marriage is great and then have 2 kids as soon as I can get it over and done with.

My little brother I are 3 years and 3 months apart and we get alone great. Even now that I'm almost 21 and hes almost 18 we are like best friends. I wouldn't go any more then 4 years apart for kids because I know many don't get alone.  

Answer 16

What does it matter if they're "too close in age"? You can't change that now. They'll argue and fight just like ALL siblings do. And they'll still love each other. =) And why do you need your sister's approval to be happy? You're having a baby-- be excited! Congratulations!

Answer 17

well one it is proven a woman will have another child with in 3 years of each other ..im average 3 years apart from my siblings , my kids are 22 months apart . i had 2 in diapers . your fine, pay no attention to what  your family  says on that .

Answer 18

It's better this way I think. My brother and I are only a year and a half apart. We're kind of close. If you have them too far apart, they won't be able to really connect. I think it's better this way. My brother is the closest person to me in this world. Even though he can be a prick sometimes....but I still love the guy. I wouldn't have it any other way. I want my children to be close together, that way they can share a lot of the same experiences. I'm about to be 19 next month and he's 20. Bottom line is, you should love that your children are going to be close. They'll be able to bond better. They wouldn't really know each other if there was a big age gap. That's pretty much it, I think you're blessed to have them close, cherish it.

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Answer 19

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