What should i do about my 10 year old son?

Question

He doesnt want to do his chores. He has a very bad attitude. Now he says hes just gonna kill himself.

Answer 1

I think that your son needs to be straightened out. At 10 years of age he's showing signs of rebellion and disdain for authority.

   These tendancies are bound to get progressively worse if you can't find a way to turn him around now.

    I can't be 100% sure, but the suicide threat is designed to manipulate you into giving in to him. I get the impression that he feels like he's in a power struggle with you, and is pulling out all the stops to get you to back down.

     The only remedy in this type of situation is to implement and enforce stricter rules. Your son has to be made aware that consequences will occur when his behaviour is inappropriate and you have to stick to your guns unwaveringly.

   It's not easy, but you have to do it.

Answer 2

He is entering puberty.  If you don't have rules set and if he doesn't have to EARN privleges (television, video games, computer time) I suggest you start setting rules and make him EARN his privlieges with his behavior.  Limit his time to a half hour to hour each per day and if he doesn't behave he doens't earn them simple as that.

Answer 3

I would take everything away from him , make him stay in his room besides going to the bathroom and coming out for meals ,  take anything that he can play with out of his room , do this for about a week , but don't give everything back in a week , make him earn his things back , starting with small things , and don't allow him to watch TV until all of his chores are done ...

Answer 4

Take everything away and make him earn everything back... I mean everything... empty out his room.

As far as the suicide threats - I would contact a counselor, pastor etc. right away and get him into some counseling.

Answer 5

Ask him what's going on at school. Pay attention to him. Spend more time with him. It's either something at home or at school, or possibly both. Figure out what's bothering him and tackle the problem.

Answer 6

He's saying that to get to you.  If he doesn't do his chores, take away one privilege for each chore.  Doesn't take out the trash?  Bye-bye game console.  Refuses to clean out the dishwasher?  Hasta la vista tv privileges (including computer, dvds, etc.).  Keep going.  If he continues, start removing objects from his room.  It won't kill him to have only 5 changes of clothes and a mattress on the floor of his room.  If you're consistent enough, he's going to figure out that having his stuff around him is worth doing his chores.

And the next time he threatens to kill himself, take him to a mental hospital.  Ask him if he wants to spend time there.  When he looks at you all confused, you can tell him that clinically depressed people who are a danger to themselves are placed in mental hospitals where their basic needs are tended to and they have counseling all day.  When they're good, they can go outside to the concrete box without a ceiling for a half hour.  Then ask him again if he wants to kill himself over some chores.

Answer 7

talk to him straight.  tell him that if he's not gonna do his chores you'll cut one of his favorite past time like playing games in computer.  or tell him otherwise that if he do his chores, he'll be rewarded fairly.  and [pray for your child regularly, it works.

Answer 8

is there something going on different like are you divorced or something try to talk to him when he is relaxed

Answer 9

Give him some opputurnities or like give him pocketmoney, make a deal with him or just ignore what he says when he says hes going to kill him self he is just doing it all for attention.

Answer 10

IDK. But do not take him to therapy!!! They will just give him Happy pills!!! And trust me, they make it so you cant sleep! They put me on i think proaxin and it makes it so i can't sleep til like 7:30 a.m!

Answer 11

Call his daddy.

That always gets me to obey.

Answer 12

well ignor him for awyle then he will be get board then do his chores and then be happy

Answer 13

Is he on any drugs? By that I mean street drugs and legal drugs (anti-depressants, etc.). If so, they may not be working for him and he should have a doctor slowly take him off.

Production is the basis of morale. The more you produce in life, the better you feel.  It's a long path to making him feel better about himself, but build him up. Give him opportunities to do well and projects to work on. It will make a change like you've never seen.

Answer 14

You may want to get him counseling. Sounds serious if he talking about killing himself. You should never take that lightly.

Answer 15

The first thing you need to do is take his threat very seriously. He is obviously disturbed about something. You need to visit a counsellor urgently, but also start to spend some more time with your son.  



The chores thing can wait and will sort itself out down the track. The thing kids like most is quality time with their parents. Even if you are very busy, start to make it a priority to spend some one on one time with your son a few times a week.

Even if you have to leave other siblings with a baby sitter just do it. You will find that your son appreciates the one on one time and this will help you get to the bottom of some of his problems. Perhaps he is being bullied at school? Just listen to him and see what you can pick up from your time together.

But you must go into this from the avenue of wanting to spend time with him, not wanting to extract information from him. He will talk when he knows that you are there for him. And if he doesn't talk to you that's where the Counsellor will come in very handy.

Your son needs to be at peace with himself and when that happens you will find that chores become much easier for him. Perhaps spend a week not growling at him for anything but instead seeing how many things you can think of to compliment him on. I know this can be a hard one, but it really does pay dividends with kids who need a bit extra affirmation.

Answer 16

i would take him seriously.  take him to a counsler, pastor someone that he can talk to. something might have happened that he didn't tell you about or doesn't want to.

Answer 17

Send him to boot camp.......

Answer 18

There is definately something going with him. First step is call a therapist. Get him some help quick! Keep in mind though that "i'm going to kill myself" has become quite the popular manipulation tactic amoung teens and preteens. But just to be safe, get him seen by a pro. Good luck!

Answer 19

therapy

Answer 20

Ok for a 10 year old that is noy a phase. They usually have that phase when theyre like 5-7 as in the time when they think that you can come back if you die. So I think you should try to talk to him and fgure out what is going on.