What should i do and ask at my baby shower ?? and should i even have one..im giving the baby away

Question

?? its a hard and weird choice but well my parents and friends say its ok to have a baby shower even though im giving the baby away....

wat do u think? only mature answers plz no rude comments..im not up to that today

Answer 1

I think that it would be very emotional for you to have a baby shower if you are going to give the baby up for adoption.  If it were me I wouldn't.  The kind of stuff you get is the type of stuff you need to raise a baby, which you wont be experiencing (yet).  Good for you though for making such an important decision.  You will make some couple so very happy that cant have a baby on their own and oh so badly want one.  It is a very selfless thing you are doing, and it takes guts.  Good for you, and God Bless!!

Answer 2

Oh Honey, bless your heart, I think it might make it harder on you to see all the baby stuff, but it's up to you, you might send the items you get along with the baby...God bless you...

Answer 3

well hun, i would recommend not doing it.. it may be harder for you..if the foster parents are going to be involved in the baby shower then why not? right? but if not then don't do it... hope i helped and if there's any problems please email me i'll be happy to help!

with love,

kitty.

Answer 4

I wouldn't have one...let the woman that you are giving the baby to have the baby shower...

Answer 5

I don't see what the point would be in having a baby shower when you are planning on giving the baby up for adoption (unless there are people trying to convince you otherwise).  The entire purpose of having a shower is to buy gifts for the mother to-be so she can set up the nursery with baby clothes, toys, and furnishings.  If you aren't going to keep the baby, you don't really need any of those things, and I think it's pretty insensitive of people to throw you a party to remind you of that fact.

If someone offers to throw one for you, politely decline.

Answer 6

I think it's highly inappropriate.  A baby shower is not a money grubbing excuse.  The purpose of it is to get new items to help you raise the baby.  If you're not keeping the baby, you don't need anything new.

Either you're making it up, or your friends and family are morons.

Answer 7

Is this a fake question? How inappropriate, to receive items for the baby you are giving up. Are you going to donate the items to the new mother of the baby? I hope that is what you mean. If that is the case, go for it. Just let everyone know the shower is for the new mother.

Answer 8

Please don't give that child away. You made it, You should take care of it. How old are you anyway? Having a baby-shower would make you want the baby even more.

Answer 9

Yeah your right that is a very tough choice, and I feel for you!! I guess it is completely up to you to have the baby shower, but it may make people feel uncomfortable? Are the people who are adopting willing to accept the baby stuff you recieve at the shower or would they rather not have it? You need to sit down and take some serious time to think about it. If it were me I would probably not have a baby shower, because it would make me feel not very good. Take care, good luck with everything!!

Answer 10

instead of you having the baby shower the adopted family should.mostly because people give gifts at the shower...so what do u do with them?? so it woudn't make sense

Answer 11

I don't see a point in having a baby shower if your giving the baby away, unless you just wanna collect the gifts and money but that would be rude and disshonest. seriously though, what would be the point? think about that

Answer 12

If you are giving the baby up then you shouldn't have a baby shower. It's not right and it would look like you were just looking for presents or money. Sorry, but it's true. :(

You could throw a shower for the adoptive mother, that would be nice and the baby would still benefit from it.

You're a strong person to be able to give your baby up, feel proud of yourself you are a giving and caring person. Good luck!!

Answer 13

Well thanks first for not aborting your baby. Adoption is the answer not murder. I have never heard of anyone having a baby shower in this situation. Baby showers are a great way to get diapers, clothes etc.. that you will need raising your baby so I don't see why you would want one. What in the world would people bring?

I think it is up to the new parents to have a baby shower for this baby.

Answer 14

i would have a shower along with the family that is adopting. i applaude you for giving the child to a loving family, you are bringing joy to that family and doing what you feel is best for the child. my baby shower wasn't only for gifts, it was a celebration of the birth of my child. and get a snuggli. sometimes you don't want to carry the child everywhere (they get heavy quickly) and sometimes you don't want to lug around the stroller. with a snuggli your hands are free, and the baby is close. its a real lifesaver.

Answer 15

you should have a babyshower, but on the invitations tell the guests that the baby gifts will be donated to the parents/orphanage that you are giving the baby to.

hope i helped! xoxoxo goodluck!

Answer 16

Praises to you for giving your baby a chance for a better life than you can give him/her. It may be the hardest decision that you will ever make, but it's a wise and good and generous decision.

I'm not sure that a shower would make things easier for you, though. Getting stuff for the baby may make you want to keep it, and make it harder for you to let others raise her and give her a good home. It would be lovely to have things that you could send with the baby to her new home, but you won't be bringing her home from the hospital, surely, and her adoptive parents will be just as excited to have a "going home" outfit for her, too.

Maybe your friends secretly want you to keep the baby, and this is a way to get you to be attached to it and change your mind. Would it make it harder for you to do the right thing and let her be adopted and raised by a loving 2 parent family?

Answer 17

No.  It's unnecessary for you to get baby items when you're not going to even keep the baby.  

EDIT: don't let people tell you it is cruel to give your baby away.  You're doing what you think is best so ignore people who are saying things like that.  In whatever situation you are in, I am sure you are doing the right thing.  Goodluck and take care

Answer 18

A baby shower is where family and friends gather in honor of the mother and the baby.  

The gifts at the baby shower are for the baby.  I think if you are giving the baby up for adoption maybe refrain from having a shower.  I just don't see the reason for you to have one.  

Answer 19

well if ur giving the baby to a family thats notfinanciallyy stable then u should just have one & give baby items to the family unless u need them. Even still itll probaly be fun  

Answer 20

NO if you are not keeping the baby it is wrong to ask friends and family to purchase things for you and the baby!

Answer 21

Why would you have a shower to get Baby gifts for a baby that you are giving away?  Doesn't make much sense to me.  Did you see that episode of Friends when they gave Phoebe a baby shower for the babies she was giving away...it didn't' go too well.

Answer 22

Yeah. A babyshower is a celebration of life. Its like their first birthday party. Ask for things like prenatal massages, facials, etc. things to spoil you during the pregnancy and during the hard period of giving the baby away. Also if they like they can get the baby a gift and you can give them to the adopting parents. If you are close to them maybe throw it with them and they can get gifts for the baby,

Answer 23

My answer..... Keep the baby. It's pointless and kind of cruel to give it away. Just think, either growing up knowing you don't have real parents, or finding that out when your older.... Anyway, if you really are going to give it away (for whatever reason, who knows, maybe it will have a better life) Do whatever.

Answer 24

no rude comments coming your way, if you want my opinion, I personally do not  think you should have  a baby shower considering your giving it away, I would just let the parents or parent that is taking the infant to have baby shower, and I guess you could have one, and explain to your guests that all of the gifts and stuff would go to the new parents along with the baby, but anyways this isn't my place to get into, so anyways best of luck!

Answer 25

i dont really see the point, ud be getting a bunch of things for the baby and what would u do with them. the parents that will be taking the baby have probably gotten their own things and i think it would make u sad and make u want the baby more and i dont think its a good point and i dont know why ur friends and family would suggest it

Answer 26

What are you going to do with the items you get at the shower?  Are you going to give them to the adoptive parents?  Or is the baby going to a foster home to wait to be adopted?

If you're going through a private adoption and already know who the adoptive parents are going to be, then don't have a shower.  Chances are, they're already buying things for the baby and so are their friends and family.  Besides, having a shower for a baby you can't keep will tear you to pieces.

If the baby is going into the county's foster care system, why don't you ask your case worker if the shower gifts can accompany the baby?  It would be a shame to have a shower (which is going to be tough on your emotions), gather all these lovely gifts, and find out later that none of it went with your baby but was randomly distributed to other foster parents.

Honey, bless you for being willing to give your baby an adoptive home.  That is such a difficult decision to make.  My opinion is that a shower would hurt your heart.  But you know, I might be wrong.  Having a shower may very well give you some more peace of mind, and it will surely let you see how many people love you and your baby.  So if you're up to it, then go ahead.  But like I said, find out first what will happen to the gifts.

Good luck to you.

Answer 27

Well, if you are giving the baby up for adoption, then DO NOT have a baby shower.  That would just be awkward.  Baby showers are for the parents to have the baby supplies and toys they will need for the baby.  What are you supposed to to with all that stuff??  Also, it can be very emotional and sad to put yourself through that if you don't plan on keeping the baby.  So, I don't think it's a good idea at all!  Good luck, in whatever you decide to do...

Answer 28

:O

No dont have one.

if your giving the baby away whats the point ?

you wont need the stuff

so no dont have one because it will be harder for you and theres no pint if your not keeping the baby x

Answer 29

well sorry, but I don't think it's appropriate. the mother of the woman adopting your baby could have a shower, but you shouldn't. it will just make you feel sad and the guests will feel awkward. what are people going to talk about at the shower knowing they will more than likely never even see the baby?

Answer 30

Your giving the baby up for adoption and having a shower.  I think that is horrible.  Unless of course the new parents are involved and there. That would be fine.  I would include them if you can and then it should be OK.

I would find that ignorant being invited to a shower, buying a gift for YOU and YOUR baby and find out your not keeping the baby.  What is the point of that.  I would really rethink that one.  I am surprised that was even suggested.

Good Luck to you.  What a kind thing to do , give your baby to someone who can't have one.

Answer 31

Don't ask for things like cribs or anything like that, the new parents will most likely want to have stuff like that for him/her.

Ask for things like, toys,

clothes,

things that it can't have too much of. :)

Or maybe gift cards to like, babies r us.