What should i doooo????

Question

my girlfriend and i have been dating for two years now and we have had no problems. there has been a lot of talk about "forever" and marriage. but there is one major problem, she is a very orthodox christain and i am not christain at all. she has to hide me from her parents but i know she really loves me. she says the only solution is to convert. but my family is very traditional and does not want me to marry anyone out of my religion. i love her very much but i dont want to upset or disrespect my family and relatives by converting to be with her. my family and people of my religion are very traditional and i know they would look down upon converting. i know people will look down upon me and my family if i do this and i dont want to put my family though that. i dont know what to do and i have to decide soon. i can convert and feel guilty and like a traitor to my family and religion and be with the girl of my dreams, or make my family happy and live without her (we dont know how to end our relationship if this happens, there will still be feelings but we want to continue our friendship if all fails)

there is no one else like her

so confusedddddd

Answer 1

I would recommend talking to the religious leader from both religions ( a Priest, Rabi etc )to see how this is usually handled. You are not the first person to have this problem. Hopefully they can make things clearer for both of you. Good Luck.

Answer 2

Neither of you need to convert, or leave each other

You have found your soulmate. Love doesn't discriminate against religions

Get married but don't convert. You can have a joint religious ceremony.

Your parents will get over it in time. Yes they will be angry and upset, and her parents will be angry too. But pfft, you are in love and that is all that matters, they might not agree but there is nothing they can do about it. Eventually they will understand this and you will come to an agreement to "agree to disagree"  

Answer 3

ooh, romeo and juliet!!!

run away and elope!!!!

(just don't kill yourselves)

Answer 4

In my opinion, if you are happy with each other and in love, then you should find a way to stay with each other forever.  It's easy to say, but you need to convince your families that you both want to be together, and it's YOUR decision.  No one else's...  Best of luck.

Answer 5

as a christian, she will have trouble with being as the bible says "unequally yoked", converting for marriage sake is not what Christianity is about, its about your personal relationship with Jesus.

You two need to mabey see a counselor and work this out. if you want it to work it will take allot of effort

Answer 6

This is a good place to start for advice, but if you guys don;t find what you need here I hope you seek professinal advice. It sounds like you have something really special and that is worth a lot.

WIth that said, can you try and share some of this with SOME part of her family and see if they can get a beat for how things might go down for you? Maybe there is someone in the fam that is a tiny bit more liberal and might help guide you guys in getting the rest of the family to "buy off" on what you guys have going?

If they really want a convert, maybe the best chance of that happening is through time. Each of you being exposed to the others religion might foster this. Then again if that doesn;t happen who cares, hopefully, everyone will have grown to respect your matrimmony at that point.

I wish you luck!

Answer 7

well it sounds like you realy love her deeply! let me just say dont give her up for any reason like that. family and religion can be a touph one but take it from me who is very in love with my husband and who is a different religion than i. we were-are strong in our religion so neither of us wanted to convert, although our family didnt have a problem with us marrying because of it.we were kindof in a pannic about it to. but then we just agreed to keep our religions seperate and to agree to disagree on each others differences in religion. over the years we have learned about each others religions and we are ok with having that seperate in our lives. as far as our child goes, we teach him about both of them and not push one more than the other and when he gets older he will be able to make up his own mind as to which one he wants to be. but please please please dont give up the love of your life just because of religion or because of the familys. they will learn to love her. make your self happy first, and keep in mind that eather choice you make will be something that you will have to deal with for the rest of your life.