What should i tell him?

Question

this past weekend i went on a trip with my dad's friend from work and his family. my dad's friend's son and i got really close & we ended up laying out until 3am looking at the stars & kissing. this guy kept telling me that im what he needs in his life & i make him want to quit bad habits (ie. drinking) he's only had one girlfriend & she cheated on him. & he told me that that hurt him and he's now afraid of rejection. i know he wants to be more than just friends & im afraid that ive might have lead him on. he's talking about wanting to be in a relationship w me. this is the first time we've met and i have a feeling that he's acting on what happened that night. i just dont know how to tell him i want to be friends.

btw: another reason we couldnt have a relationship - we would barely ever seen each other because he lives like an hour and a half away & neither of us drive.

because our parents are friends; ill have to see him again sometime & i dont want things to be awkward.

Answer 1

You shouldn't have kissed him, if you didn't have feelings for him. You say you don't want to lead him on, but you already have. He's developed a thing for you, so either way, you are going to hurt him.

If you didn't want to be in this position, you shouldn't have put yourself in it. You are the only one that can get out of it now. You are going to hurt a poor, innocent guy that did nothing but care for you.

That's real cool.

Break it off now, before he gets to close.

Next time think a little bit, before you act.

Answer 2

He has a fear of rejection. You know you are gonna have to reject him, since you do not want to be in a relationship with him, and he wants to be in one with you. So honestly, the sooner the better. At first, try and make it sound like you can't be with him due to reasons out of your control. Be sure and let him know that you think he's a nice guy, but he lives so far away, neither of you can drive, and you don't think having a relationship under those conditions would be a good thing to do. That it wouldn't be good for anyone, and wouldn't even really be much of a relationship.

If he won't buy that, then tell him you realize he's been hurt in the past, but that he can't allow that bad experience to rule the rest of his dating life. Tell him he will face rejection, everyone does, and that you don't want him to just throw himself into a relationship with you because he wants to be in a relationship. Tell him that you had fun with him, but right now, it is not what's right for either of you.

He sounds like a sweet guy, so that would be my way of letting him down easy.

Well tell him that, say you like him, he's a good guy, but you worry about letting him down. Tell him you're confused, and you just can't put yourself into a relationship right now.

Answer 3

because he's been hurt, you need to be honest with him and do it soon. It may be awkward a couple times, but you being honest will help him deal with it better, and just apologize to him that you feel you may have lead him on. He'll move on with it and things will be find. you'll be buddies again in no time.