What should you do if you have to burp/f**t/have diarrhea in public?

Question

What should you do if you have to burp/f**t/have diarrhea in public and there are no restrooms?

Answer 1

Do it all very discretely, and get out of there as fast as you can!

Answer 2

"Everybody leave, I have to p**p"

Problem solved :)

Answer 3

burp with your mouth shut into a napkin or your hand and say 'xcuse me' quietly even if noboyd notices. hold it in.... for the last one u must be sick, so say ur sick! anyway how is there not a restroom??????

Answer 4

burp... try to contain it. if not, let it rip QUIETLY

f**t-same thing.

have diarreha... go to some palce empty and get a plastic bag and just let it rip.

Answer 5

Burping: Let it out. Do not try to hold them in! If you do, the next time you open your mouth, it will "fall" out. Just make it as silent as possible and look surprised when you do it. That way, everyone around you will think it was an accident.

Farting: Hold them in. When you are safe, let them come out naturally becuase they will be HUGE and it provides hours of entertainment.

Diarrhea: You are pretty much screwed. Just find a closet or something. Wipe with other people's coats.