What shud I do? I'm completely lost.?

Question

Me n my boyfriend r livin togetehr in London now for almost a year, weve been together for 2 years.

He's always had a very stubborn personality, but for the past 5 months its been unbearable.

We argue over the smallest things bcuz he cant let things go, im quite stubborn myself but i hav the ability to just "drop things" however, his way of arguing and debatin has been critized by many.

He shouts, verbally abuses and offends ppl this is especially to me bt smetiems also to other like close friends. I dnt kno wt to do anymore.

I love him bt i feel like im on the verge of breaking up.

He gets quite violent whenever we fight, and its happened often tht hes pushd me around, once he even spat me in my face. He doesnt seem to understand the difference between wt a woman can do and a man. I dnt hit him, bt when i c him loosin control and pushin me around i hit him bac in defense.

Lately we've been fightin A LOT. He is currently not workin (we live of our parents who pay our bills and rent and send us money for food) we are together very well off and additional i hav a very gud job at a hedgefund as a PA.. I save a lot of my money bt like any girl i am crazi about clothes as it has been my passion since i was a small girl.

He often critizes wt i buy n spend my money on even tho it doesnt affect him at all. It is my money which I earn and i do often pay for him, this makes me so angry bcuz i feel guilty for indulgin in smetin whch is my passion and which i deserve after weeks of hard work. And believe me I am not crazi in spendin money over past 3 months (since i got my job) Ive saved up more than 3000 pounds, bt as soon as i buy smetin he wants to make me feel bad about it.

I often feel like i wanna move away, bt dno how I'd b able to support myself to 100%.

I feel lonely often with him, in the beginnin of our relationship he gave him al his attention ofc its slowed down which i dnt mind bt i often feel he takes me for granted and treats me like pure sh**. I do everything for him, i cook, i clean and do his luandry even tho he's the one at home (hes studyin to pass a FSA exam n work at a hedgefund aswell).

And whenever I cme home frm work he jus continues chattin to friends on msn and ignorin me even tho Ive been gone all day.

Help me, wt shud i do? Wt can i do to change him or myself or shud i jus giv up and leav?

Answer 1

To me it sounds like he is not in love with you any more.

Why would you want to stay with a man who treats you the way he does?

If your parents help with some money and you have a job, you will probly be able to support yourself better then you think.

You need to decide exactly what you want in a boy friend and decide if he measures up to what you want.

If he does not then it is time to find what you want.

Letting go is hard at first, but you have to look to the future and find the happness you desearve.

You can not change him, he is the only one who can change himself.

You desearve to be happy and now you are not, I would say the old saying nothing ventured nothing gained applies to you.

If you do not go looking for happness, then you are not going to be happy.

So go looking for happness and enjoy all the new experiences awaiting you.

Answer 2

Just give up and elave sweetheart you dont deserve to be treated like this!! Its really bad he as got no respect for you atall ... and for spitting in your face i would of left him there and then!!

I kno you love him and it would be hard with uot him but u wud have such a better life with out him he dont deserve you he is a looser!!!

you should never feel bad about what u buy its your money you earnt it, he is just jelouse!( i kno a guy like this )

You sound like a realli nice girl who can take care of them selves get rid of him and find some one else!! Have loads of fun!!!!

Seriously hink of youself and put ur self first!!

Hope it works out good luck xxxxx

Answer 3

Here's what you do go to the nearest sports store buy a baseball bat. Comfront the mf  and let him now what's going on and how you feel. Let him know the rules and laws of your relationship. If he breaks them then break him. Jk but seriously let him know that this bs is killing you and that you can't stand it much longer if he is not sincere in saying sorry dump him. Don't let your self be treated like s7h7i7t anymore. He is a jerk I hope everything works out for the best. Good luck!    1

Answer 4

leave

Answer 5

My days it makes me cringe everytime i see this "he hits me should i stay or go" do you really need someone to tell you the answer?

Answer 6

You need to prepare yourself for the emotional drainage you are about to experience and leave him.  It will hurt for awhile, and you will feel lonely at tomes, but believe me, you will get over it. I DID

Answer 7

If it sounds like abuse, if it feels like abuse, it is abuse and this is a classic example of it.  It won't get better, it will get worse.  He is controlling and manipulating you and you need to pack your bags and get as far away from him as you can before you get seriously hurt.  The emotional abuse you are being exposed to is what is wearing you down and that's what he's trying to do........lower your self esteem until you feel like you have no option but to stay with him.

There comes a time when you have to say enough is enough and you've already stayed long past that time!

Answer 8

dump his ***...a man sorry GENTLEMAN should neva hit or spit at a lady. You deserve better. Whats your email add?

Answer 9

hey there, no offence to u but ur bf isnt a man but a coward, i think one of the main reasons ur with him is coz ur probably worried that how will u cope on ur own as uve havent been on ur own for quite a while, i think u should try and sit down and talk to him about ur relationship, but mind u he might not listen especially if hes stubborn, suggest to him relationship councelling hes obviously got a problem with his anger,

ask a close friend or family member to speak to him, think about who hes most likely to listen to and tell that person to speak to him about what hes doing to u and ur relationship with him is going downhill, if all fails then u should leave him.

not all guys r like that, u deserve better, someone that will spend time with u, respect and listen to u and help out with housework,

think about this carefully, do u really want to spend ur life with someone so violent, think about what'll happen in the future especially if u end up having kids with him, take my advice and try to talk to him, if he doesnt then ~LEAVE HIM.

takecare hun x

Answer 10

He could really hit you one day.

Your choice.