What skills do children need to have before they start nursery and school?

Question

Do they need to be able to count up to a certain number? Should they be able to spell their name out loud or write it? Should they be saying all of their words correctly?

My daughter starts nursery next Friday and we have always been very pleased with her abilities and progress. However, after talking to other moms who have said that their 3 year old can write his/her own name, I am slightly concerned that my daughter wont be as advanced as the rest of her class.

If anyone could clear this up for me I would really appreciate it.

Answer 1

Most preschools accept children at every developmental level.  I've yet to come across a preschool who says your child has to be able to do this, this, and this... (except for being potty-trained).  We preschool teachers are just helping with the foundation of learning and take every child as they come to use.

And really, you really can "cram" with a preschool student in this week you have left...So don't worry too much.  :-) I think you will find that the majority of the students are probably at a similar level as your daughter.  

As for writing their name at 3 years old... Ummm..young threes?  Older threes?  I find that most children are starting to write the first letter of their name at 3 years old...they definately can recognize their name at 3 if they've been exposed to name recognition and practicing writing their name, hand over hand.  Some children can write their name between 3.5-4 years old but most really do not write their name until 4 years or older...mainly because of exposure and practice.  

If it seems to you that your child is at the tail-end of the developmental levels in her classroom...after a couple weeks go by...ask the preschool teachers what you can do at home to help in her weaker areas.  

Good luck!

Answer 2

omg please don't get sucked into a competition.  All children learn at different stages and at 3 years old its not so important.  The ONLY skill a child needs to have before starting nursery/school is daytime toilet training, everything else will come in time.  There will always be a child that is smarter or not so smart as yours but happiness matters more.  Enjoy your child without the pressure of competitive mums in the playground.  It is easy to feel your child is inadequate when listening to others but every child is different and special in their own unique way.  I got caught up in the competition myself when my daughter started nursery bit soon realised that it just made both of us miserable.  Its not worth it, childhood is short enough anyway without extra pressure.  Love your daughter for who she is, not for what you think she should be achieving.

Answer 3

Social skills are more important at this age. Toilet training is a must. As long as she is able to interact with other adults and children and can sit for  a little while to listen to a story then you have no worries.  Children need to play and learn through play there is too much emphasis put on writing skills at this age. Don't fall into the trap of comparing and pushing your little one. She has only been on the earth for 3 years and has a long way to go so let her enjoy her childhood.

In the Netherlands the children do not start formal education until the age of 6 and yet most outperform children in Britain.

Answer 4

Why oh why do we insist on comparing our children to others? Or bragging about our children's accomplishments? It only leads to making parents, like yourself, uncertain about their own child's progress. I'm sure your daughter is just fine!

When I taught preschool to 3 yr olds, I had absolutely NO expectations about their abilitiies. Some could count, some knew their colours, others did not. They were all different. They did not need to know how to count. They certainly did not need to be able to spell or write their own name or anything else and I don't recall that any of them did so. At 3, most children are not saying all of their words correctly as some speech sounds don't develop fully until later. My daughter (a gifted child, now age 10) had speech therapy in gr. 1 because a couple of sounds hadn't developed properly yet. They were corrected in 6 months. No biggie.

Even my daughter's kindergarten teacher only wanted her students to:

-be able to put on outerwear and shoes independently

-be able to use the toilet independently

-know how to use a pair of scissors

-recognize their own name in print

This was for 4 and 5 yr olds at one of the top 3 schools in our province. Anything else they knew was bonus.

Answer 5

you should be practising copying shapes (sneak in some letters) and drawing etc with here to help her pencil grip and fine motor control but no she doesn't need to be able to write her name unaided.  By the age of three i would expect a child to count up to ten or more by rote but i wouldn't expect them to have any understanding of quantity of more than 2 or 3.  By the age of 4 i would expect the child to be able to count to 20 or more by rote.  Don't worry about you child, the nursery will tell you what she needs to work on, all children have different learning styles so if she is behind in anyway, im sure she will catch up no bother

Good luck :)

Answer 6

Your child needs to special skills or training at the age of 3. Some nursery's do not even require your child to be toilet trained (my daughter's nursery didn't) although you should probably check with your daughters nursery how they feel about this if you need to.

Just let her enjoy being a kid for now because the opportunity will be gone in the not too distant future.

Answer 7

3yr. olds writing their name?   They're either lying to you, or they have super geeks for kids! Don't worry, if your daughter can wipe her butt, and feed herself, she's pretty much ready for pre-school!  She'll learn all the other stuff after she's there, that's what pre-school is for!  I've stayed at home with my 4yr. old since he was born, and he can count to 10, and knows all colors and shapes, can feed, dress, and wipe himself.  And I'm very happy with that!  We just play and have fun while we can, and if I have an opportunity to teach him something, I do, but I'm not going to force an academic curriculum on him at home. That's what school is for!  Relax!

Answer 8

Grade one (starting between ages 5 & 6) I'd say the following:

Toilet trained (daytime)

Be able to deal with their shoes

Alphabet

Basic words (Golden Books level, See Spot Run)

Count to at least 20 (if not 100)

Recognise their name

Age three?  Way less.

Answer 9

Basic skills needed for the child to take care of themselves for example when to say no, when to ask for help. Spelling, counting etc will be learned as they start classes. Being too anxious will spoilt the child's interest in learning. All of us have different learning speed. Let the child grow on their own (with your help to lead them to the right direction) without pressurising them.

Answer 10

I was worried about this also, after reading about this stuff I learned that the only thing they need to know is the basic stuff that we as parents are teaching them. Don't listen to the other mother's who say their kids can do this or do that because they are just bragging. Please just remember how far your daughter has come along and how proud you are because it sounds like you have been teaching her what she's supposed to be doing because you said yourself you're very pleased with how she's doing. Also, you'll forget about what the other mom's are saying after you pick her up from school everyday and you see how good she's doing and how much fun she's having and the teacher telling you how great she's doing I know what these mom's are saying will be the last thing you think about. I think the moms are just trying to get assurance from others for some reason and just bragging.

Answer 11

http://www.standards.dfes.gov.uk/eyfs

This website is what in England funded preschools use as a curriculm framework! It may give you some idea of what is expected. However really preschool is for learning and for fun so they wont expect a genius child...

Really its things like:

-know their name (not necessarily spellign or recognising the letters)

-independence (or working towards) such as coat on, hang it up, pull trousers up and down.

-working towards toilet training preferably however they do accept children in pull ups/nappies.

-hold own cup and able to eat unaided!

At 3all children are individual and because of different interests, dislikes, background and abilities will all be at differnet levels. As you will see there is nothing that says a child must read and write before starting preschool and being able to count is different to just reciting 1-10 as a rhyme!

I wouldnt worry too much-:)

Answer 12

The real flyers are those children that understand the need to listen and obey those in who's trust they are placed, those that cannot grasp their situation will become unsettled and disruptive and quite frankly are a sorry result of spoiling by silly parenting or home life i.e grandparents.

The necessary skills are laid down by parents who can impart discipline at home and who lay the foundation of good citizenship at their side of the garden gate... it is no sin to say no, it is however not your worry as to how well a child can count... that is for the teacher, here is the rub... if your child cannot or will not listen then he/she will be sidelined and others will flourish.

To sum up... leave the schoolwork to the teachers and the simple manners to yourselves as parents and your child will fly.