What sort of things should a typical 4 year old know how to do?

Question

I strongly feel that my 4 year old son is behind. I am currently awaiting a call back from Child Find but I'd like to have other opinions.

My son turned 4 on June 4th.

He has a very vivid imagination and can come up with some of the craziest stories and songs. That is about the only thing that makes me doubt he is behind.

He can count to 5.. but sometimes skips 4. He can't recognize ANY numbers.

He doesn't know ANY of his alphabet and doesn't recognize letters.

He can't draw anything but squiggly lines and mishapped circles.

He doesn't know how to spell or write his name.

Occasionally he will recognize the color blue. He calls red Pink (always) and calls black and brown chocolate (don't ask me why, we don't give him candy) He can not recognize any of the other colors but he can randomly name most.

He can recognize a circle and a triangle but no other shapes.. He can't even name other shapes.

He is about 90% potty trained & only started pooping in the toilet about a month ago.

Answer 1

When I worked as a four year old kindergarten teacher we evaluated the children on many different aspects.  He is in no way behind yet but there are things that he needs to know by the age of 5.  To have mastered a topic they needed to know the majority of something (for instance shapes they would need to know circle, square, triangle, heart, diamond, oval, rectangle, and star)  As your son only knows a couple we would call that emerging.

Colors he should know would be blue, red, yellow, green, pink, purple, orange, brown, black, and white.

He doesn't need to know how to write or spell but should be able to recognize about 5 letters (doesn't matter which ones)

and he should be able to count to 10 and recognize a few of the numbers from 1 to 10.

Drawing should be able to draw a fairly straight line.  He should be able to draw a person with a few characteristics.

These are things you can work on now and then by the time he turns 5 he won't be behind at all.  Remember that all kids develop at different rates and also remember that boys tend not to like the fine motor stuff as much as girls do so it takes them a bit longer to master.  And don't worry as a teacher we also evaluate their gross motor and play.  So if he does great in building with blocks, imaginary play, using qualitative and quantitaive words, fitting pieces into puzzles, bouncing a ball, throwing a ball, jumping, balancing, pouring liquids, using fork or spoon, etc then he is probably doing just fine.  Not everyone excels in every area.

Answer 2

Some children just learn at a different rate and through different interests and methods....there's nothing that says a child MUST know all the stuff you said by a certain age! To see development 'norms' and targets based on English government ideals-http://www.standards.dfes.gov.uk/eyfs/si...

Maybe flashcards arent the approach that will work for him-have you tried 'learning through play'? Where he learns through 'doing' rather than looking...things like playing with the cars-say 'mummy's got the blue car-what colour do you want?" Even if he says wrong colour just says "oh right you want the______" and say the right colour. HE doesnt feel he is being pushed for an answer like a test.

Does he attend preschool or nursery? What do they think? If you dont attend a setting maybe its worth putting him in for a few days a week-they can give him learning journey/experiences based on their training and experience. However, if your child really is showing development delays it is best to know now as help is alot easier to find for under 5's!!! Good Luck

Answer 3

Hmm... it does sound like he's behind. My three year old nephew knows his alphabet, can read simple words, can write and spell his own first name, etc. However, his older sister was unable to until she was five. When she discovered that other children could do things like that, she quickly caught up.

However some children are late bloomers, and he is likely to come along leaps and bounds when he goes to school.

Answer 4

I am told that my 4 year old is actually ahead, but she knows all her colors, can sing the alphabet song, can recognize her letters, can spell and sometimes write her name. Her drawings are still hard to decipher. She was about 3 and a half before she was potty trained. She is behind with her speech and attended head start last year and will again this year. It was the best thing ever. Most of the things she knows now, she did not know before starting head start. Maybe you could look into a similar program in your area. Honestly though, I volunteered alot this past year at my daughter's first grade class and there was a couple kids in there that wasn't really any ahead of your son. I couldn't believe it. But one little girl didn't know a single letter of the alphabet in first grade. I wouldn't over worry about him, just try to find out how far behind he is, or even if he is, and then perhaps try new ways to help him and make learning fun. As for the potty training, if he is anything like my girls, the more you push, the worse it gets. Both of mine wouldn't do it until I gave up. He does sound a little behind, but honestly not that much.