Question:

What steps can a couple take to reduce negativity in their homes and relationship?

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Lately it seems all my fiance' and I do is argue. I have come to realize it is coming from constant negative surrounding in the home via television,songs on the radio,video games,lack of finances etc. Can anyone tell me from a CHRISTIAN standpoint (preferably) how I can stop this horrible cycle? All comments welcome I just prerferred Christian. THANKS EVERYONE>

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  1. Well im not married, and would have no idea what its like to live with a partner, but i try to make sure any fights or problems with my boyfriend are talked about before we go to sleep that night..


  2. I was having the same problem and my monther, whom is Chriatian, gave me this advice:

    1) Remind yourself that you youself is not perfect and that you yourself has things to work on as a partner and an individual.

    2) Breathe.....ask yourself "Is this that serious enough to argue about or better to be left alone?"

    3) Encourage and compliement your partner.  If he has a lack of finances, instead of being ungrateful and wished it was better, praise him when he does something good with his finances becasue he is probably doing it for you.

    4) Remember that he loves you and has chosen to spend the rest of his life with you.  Appreciate him for being that person.

  3. i dont know about christian ... but i can tell u  one thing ... your home its your castle ... u are woman ... u can make your home one peaceful place ... and outside word will not come to your home ...make your home like paradise ... dont fight with your bf for little things ... if u are sad about what he did speak with him try to explain what this thing hurts u ... when u are at your home dont speak about work or what bad things happen to u today ... only good thought and good mood ... i hope i help u ...( i do this with my husband ... so at home we are so peaceful )

  4. I am in the SAME boat...You need to get some counseling...Christian counseling..we have the same issues..the problem is if both of you aren't in the relationship for the same reason..and both willing to change..than its almost like your unequally yolked...I find in my relationship..I am as strong as he is...and we both want to be the stronger one..and its just not working...I am the sweet one he is the "jerk"  ..

       So I finally have had enough and we are gonna try counseling...and see where that goes..and if that doesnt work than I can't see us together in the future..because life is too short to be miserable.. Good Luck...

  5. I'm not Christian but I want to give you my opinion because I was having the same problem. Have you ever heard of Feng Shui? Feng Shui is an ancient art and science developed over 3,000 years ago in China. It is a complex body of knowledge that reveals how to balance the energies of any given space to assure the health and good fortune for people inhabiting it. That's a short description. If your intereseted pick up a book on it or research it online. I've also noticed that clutter in any area holds a lot of negative energy. I know this may sound a bit wacky but it has worked for me. If you don't want to try that I would suggest counseling. Hope this helps.

  6. Set up a date night when you two can just get together, go out (keep it cheap if you need to) and don't argue.  Do it every week to start a good cycle.

    Set up a signal to yourself or eachother when things are starting to get out of hand so that you can cool down, step back and take a breather.

    If the issues are coming from the tv and radio, the easiest thing to do it turn it off.

    As for finances, go through your budget and see where you can cut back.  Plan weekly meals ahead of time and stick to your list and budget.

  7. Well, maybe take a little time apart each to do something you enjoy (a few hours or so) then take a little trip somewhere nice where you can relax and be able to talk away from stress. Try to focus on the things you really love about eachother, and how insignificant the small things you argue about are.

    Validate your love, and reach for the infatuation you had in the beginning. It's always there, just sortof gets overlooked after time.

  8. talk it all out, in about two days you will be over what is said and you will have still said everything on you rmind.. gt some councelling or something

    smile at eachother, have conversations about topics you are both interested in, if you cant find any, you shouldnt reli be together now should you..

    just be polite and kind, be yourself, and just love eechother.

    arguements are part of marriage, there is no such thing as a perfect marriage. you have to work on it throughout your life..it would get boring otherwise.

  9. Look at what you have got.  You have met the person you love and want to spend the rest of your life with.  That is something amazing - to be hugely thankful for.  In comparison to this and the big issues in the world, everything else is trivia.

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