What the heck would you think if your 5 year old child said this?????

Question

Right now I am BLOW away. I have a 5 year old step-daughter that lives with us full-time. She had recently been diagnosed with oppositional defiant disorder and is one of the most defiant children I have ever seen. She blatantly disobeyed numerous times today, was extremely rude and bossy in school, and lied compulsively. After trying many things, I decided to ask her today, what would get her attention and make her stop. Not that I would leave it up to her, I was just curious what her mind frame was. She straight up told me that she should "get her butt spanked with a belt". I said are you serious? She said, yes, you should woop my butt with a belt. It's almost like she WANTS to be hit. ITS CRAZY!!!!!!!!!!!! I am flabergasted!

Answer 1

Then you should *woop* *woop* her with the belt!

Answer 2

She may have said that for the shock value.  Since she has be diagnosed with a disorder, you should start some on-line medical/community research.  Like the parents do for their autistic kids.  Find out if changing her diet would help, for example.  So many dyes in the food will trigger poor behavior as well as various food allergies (wheat, eggs, etc.)  Sounds like a version of Tourettes.  The family will need professional guidance to help work with her.

Answer 3

She was probably kidding

My little cousins say weird things like that all the time

she probably heard that from someone or the tv

Id just ask her were she heard it from

:/

Answer 4

It sounds like she is doing a lot of things to get attention. The answer was just to get a rise out of you.

Answer 5

What would I think?  I'd wonder where she got that idea.

What would I do?  I'd treat it the same as if she had said that she thought it would be good if I started yelling at her with curse words when she made a bad choice, or if she thought it would be good if I started throwing food at her whenever she behaved rudely.  

It's just not a logical, educational consequence or a way that I would choose to behave towards another human being.  I would research, explore and try out other options.  

I do agree, though, that she should be involved in this process.  It's her life, her mind, her body.  She wants to be good, to make choices that leave her feeling proud of herself & that strengthen her relationships with others.  Everyone who is sane wants that in their lives.  She needs you to help her figure out how to do that, but she needs to learn how to do it *herself* (with your help at first, but on her own, eventually).  She's got to be involved in figuring out where the breakdown is happening & finding ways to fix it.

Answer 6

Try it and find out. She probably said it because she knows you won't. What works for me is if she's acting like a two-year-old, treat her like one. Give her the early bedtime and less privileges and let her know that you're treating her like that because she's acting like that. Make it her problem and she will fix it.

Answer 7

ODD kids like to pit adults against each other such as mom and dad teacher and parents etc just to get a fight started so dont spank her butt with a belt untill you speak to dad first.

Answer 8

OUT OF THE MOUTHS OF BABES,

SHE"S GOT SOME GOOD SENSE THERE

Answer 9

When my stepson was small, he craved disipline, he never got it from his real mom; she was too busy drinking. I did not know about this until he told the lady that cut our hair. Just give her a spanking, see how she reacts to it. Maybe you will only have to do it once; I would not use a belt, your hand will do fine.

Answer 10

take a deep breath.... shes 5. sounds like someone has told her this, or she has over heard this!

in a way i agree with her, but don't do that!!!lol

this child is clearly acting out because of her parents separation (my hubby and his ex have never been together, always had separate homes). my step son is going through this, and we are trying to figure out what we are going to do as well, (we wish we had him full time!!!) my step son has had issues with sexuality, and touching of privates.... we tried to talk to his mom and she does not seem as if she really cares. so counseling is in the mix!

is your step daughter seeing a therapist? or a child psychologist?  if not i really suggest it. and i hate to say it but it sounds like either you, Sig other, and the other parent needs to take some time off of work and give this child some complete 1 on 1. maybe even take her out of school and try again next year!!!!

it might be inconvenient but it might be just what she needs. 5 year olds learn their behavior from others!!! disorder or no disorder its still learned!

i don't know if what i said helped but i wish you the best of luck!!!

Answer 11

she's spoiled

Answer 12

Do you think that another person could have said this around her? like a teacher or someone who may have said it out of frustration, when you were not present? I hope not, but it is possible. Though, they do tend to "say the darndest things". lol My 5 year old said that she doesn't want kids, ever. She wants to have a career and get a pet. She doesn't want a husband.,either. She just walked up and told me that one day while I was cooking dinner.  :) I hope you can find out, and help her.