What to do about crazy father?

Question

Ok my dad is the type that thinks the government is taking over the world and hates everyone except white people! Well the guy i dated last night is from puerto rico and moved here when he was nine. He has the whole accent and is like 5'1 and that is what attracted me to him. Well my dad ment him last night and was really nice to him and all but when i got home from the date my dad was telling me all the resons why i should break up with him and was screaming telling me how he won't stand for his daughter dating a beaner(sorry if that offends you cause it does me) and how he is only 5'1" and i am 5'8" and how that bothers him becasue if the guy is shorter than 5'8" than he is not a man! I mean the guy i am dating is legal and he treats me great! my dad is going to have to face the fact that i am probably not going to marry in my "white" race but rather someone most likley from the latino race! Is what i am doing bad? Should i listen to my father or is he crazy?

Answer 1

Well, your father sounds racist.

If the Puerto Rican guy treats you nicely, I suggest date him, marry him, have a child, etc.

Answer 2

Well said, Mr. Fancy Pants!

Answer 3

Your father is wrong and just because he is an authority figure in your life doesn't mean that every belief he holds is right. My father is racist too. He hates white and black people. I am married to a white guy and my sister has dated black guys. We didn't do this to spite his stupid belief about race; we did it because we liked the guys we have dated/married. If you're underage and live at home, the only suggestion I have is to be open with this new guy and keep this relationship discreet from your dad. If your 18+, your dad will just have to get over it.  

Answer 4

It's easy to pull out the race card. Your father is just anxious because you are dating someone who is foreign to his experiences and outside of his cultural world. Try to talk with him about this. If you really find yourself falling for Mr. Boricua (spanish term for a Puerto Rican) then go for it.. however one night's date isn't that big a deal. Also, I'd like you to analyze the statement you made.. "I am probably not going to marry in my 'white' race".. WHY? WHY would you say something like that? That's not a very intelligent thing to say.. it's just as "racist" as your dad, only in a different way. What if you met a great, intelligent white dude and said, 'Nope I ain't dating him- he is a whitey!"

I also think that your insistence on dating interracially comes from a form of self-loathing. If you don't want to marry someone white, and marry a minority instead, you will produce children who don't resemble you- or your father. There are deeper issues here. Wise up. Get smart. If your love really is genuine, and you're not doing this as a sublimated form of self-loathing or rebellion against your family, or even worse, seeking something "exotic", then yes, go for it!

For now, take a long cold look at all of this and don't be a self-hating white person.. the world is bigger and better than that.  

Answer 5

Your father is racist, from what you say.

I think that you need to decide who you'd get along with and who you want to date.... it's your life, not your father's.  He's going to have to get over it.