What to do about my mom?! (details & 10 pts.)?

Question

she stresses all the time about everything! i don't really blame her tho because everyone bugs her! they expect her to do everything and she's 57 and a single head of household & doesn't have the energy to do it, she's tries telling people, she cries all the time, and sometimes it scares me, when she's real stressed she tries to pull her hair out and bangs her head against the wall(she wont do counseling).. it makes me feel horrible although she keeps reassuring me that its not my fault, she just went to the doctor(she never really goes)... and she has a lot of different problems from her stress, and they gave her medicine, which gave her WORSE side affects.... there's nothing i can really do about anything because I'm just a lousy thirteen year old girl.:(

please help with any advice..?

Answer 1

Are you helping her out? I know you have a lot to do as well but are you helping around the house? Does she know how to say no? I know physiaclly she can say the word but when peole ask her to do things can she say no or does she automatically accept and then try to fit everything in? Has she been diagnaosed with depression? That is what this sounds like. It's not just stress it's depression.

Your not just a lousy 13 year old! You are a wonderful support to her and writing this shows your concern for her. I think you need to tak to her when she is at a low stress point and see what youcan do to help releave some of her work load. You can ask for chores around the house that she has been putting off, helping her write out the bills (write the checks and prepare them to go but let her sign them), cook meals (nothing extarvigant a can of raviloi is fine), Help with siblings (if you have any), run erradns that are close by. Anything you can think of to give her time to relax and destress. Also you can try to rub her neck and shoulders if you aren't too uncomfortable doing that.

Answer 2

Ok , let me see. Your thirteen. Theres not alot a 13 year old girl can do. My mom used to be stressed as well.

Talk to your mother, tell her it scares her when she acts likes that, and that she needs some help. Try to persaude her TO go to counsiling. Because it really does help_my mom is Living proof of that.

Its not your fault so try not to feel like it is.  Single(If she is single) Mothers have alot of stress built up on them, and sometimes they just can handle it anymore.

Answer 3

Talk to a counselor or teacher at your school about this. Or if you feel you can't do that, talk to an adult family member or family friend that you trust. Your mother needs help. Even though she tells you that it's not your fault, you're not in a healthy environment. Is your dad around? If he is, talk to him about it. Your mother's stress issues are going to end up affecting you if something isn't done. I hope someone can help her, and you. Good luck, and remember, what's happening with her IS NOT your fault.

Also, you're not "just a lousy thirteen year old girl." Don't think of yourself like that.

Answer 4

Definitely talk to a counselor, or an adult relative that you think might be able to help, I have my "freak out" moments and I have 2 girls that I hate to think that they feel any of this is their fault. There are ALOT of stresses on adults and parents these days. There are things you can do around the house, make sure your stuff is clean, clean up dishes, help make dinner or even make it for her. Have coffee ready in the morning, It really depends on your age, If your mom knows you are stressing about it, it will put more stress on her. take acre of yourself darlin

Answer 5

Honey frist of all your not a lousy 13 year old if you were you wouldnt care about your mom. I would sit her down and talk to her about your concerns she will love you for that. My advice about getting your teachers involved JUST be careful cause if they have any doubt they will call child services and look into your home situation and believe me if C.Y.S gets involved sorry to say this but its not pretty. I just dont want to hear about another family being torn apart and you go to foster care. Just talk to your mom when shes calm and ask the people that drive her crazy to stop.

Answer 6

Talk to a teacher or your school counselor.  They will help you.  If they don't keep asking somebody at school, perhaps the school nurse or principal, until they do.  You should go talk to somebody outside of the family, somebody neutral.  You're too young to have these adult problems on your shoulders.  Just remember this...You teach people how to treat you.  I hear Dr. Phil say that on his show and it's SO TRUE.  Your mom may not show you this by example but YOU are the one to set boundries and guidelines for your life.  Stay focused on your education and your future.  Try to stay out of family drama if possible, I know it's probably hard because you have to live there at your age.

So, seek help, and stay positive.  You can have a better life than it sounds like your mom has if you make good choices!

Answer 7

Sounds like serious depression and is nothing to be ashamed of.I myself have suffered from depression and have tryed many medications which seemed to make things worst!I had given up on doctors and myself until my friend/gynecologist talked me into trying Paxil.It was the greatest thing I have done for myself.No side effects and the benefits are wonderful.You or someone close to her must try and get her to see someone.I feel so bad for her and you and I hope things get better.You are not a lousy girl,you sound like a good kid trying to help her mom.

Answer 8

yes i agree with the above you must get help and speak to someone your mom deserves to be happy so do you but she wont get better on her own she needs help to do this, so you must talk to someone who will take you seriously and listen to you. Hope everything works out ok xx

Answer 9

How many people living in your house besides you and your mom? What are they bugging her about? Are they her own children? I'm not going deep into your personal life but your mom should quite calm and be responsible if she has to carry out her duty for her own children. When you said "bangs her head and pulls hair out" she must have problem in other part of her life. How is she doing with her job? Do you guys live with relatives? Excuse me, but do you have money problem? If you have too many people in the household and they are too demanding, it is also stressful and not very easy to get rid of them. She needs some quiet time by herself. If you can manage with adults, take her vacation. If she isgetting worse, she may need psychiatric or psychologist consultation. I'm so sorry to hear that. You are a good daughter. Hope everything will get better.