What to do about sons spying?

Question

Hi, I am a mother to a boy who I have recently be catching spying on me in the bedroom and after showers. I'm sure he is just gotten older and is curious and wants to see a female naked.

I just wanted some advice on what to do. Should I confront him about it or just let it go unnoticed. I don't have any problems with showing him my body either.

Any advice you could give would be great. Thanks!

Answer 1

Although it seems pretty disgusting (and could potentially be), don't treat him like a criminal. Have your husband (if you're not married, then use a grandpa or uncle) talk to him. How old is he? Has he been given the "facts of life" talk yet? He's just curious. If he continues to do it, there is a deeper issue that needs to be addressed, possibly in counseling.

My experience with this-- Once when I was in 10th grade, I was changing in my room and I heard a noise in my closet. I opened it up and my brother bolted out and screamed, 'I didn't see anything, Jen! I swear!". I Chased him across the house, punched him a couple of times, called him a "dirty pervert" only to end up finding out that my dad hadn't given him "the talk" yet and that he was just curious. He's a completely normal man now. In college. VERY smart. We get along just fine. And he doesn't have any creepy obsession with me or anything like that....

PS-- if you "don't have any problem showing him [your] body", then YOU are the one with problems. That's sexual abuse. People go to jail for that.... It's no different than a dad getting an erection and showing his p***s to his daughter.

Answer 2

I think it's normal for a tween to be curious but, I would put a stop to it, if you've noticed it more than once, that's enough.  my opinion is that it is not okay for a mother to show her naked body "off" to her son on multiple occasions  especially if you know he's watching.   Once is enough, maybe it's time for he dad to have a growing up discussion....or if that dad isn't available then another male adult figure

Answer 3

I would talk to him but don't make the human body a bad or shameful thing to him..also his age has a LOT to do with this question so it's hard to answer.

Answer 4

You don't have any problems with him showing your body?

I think you're the one that needs therpy. That's not appropriate.  

Answer 5

tell him its disrespectful to spy but show him a picture on the internet so he isn't curious.  Don't let it go unnoticed. Don't show him your body!

Answer 6

How old is he? I think you should talk to him and let him know that you have noticed him spying on you. Tell him he is not in trouble, but you would like to know why he is doing it. You could also ask if he has any questions. I would also explain that it isn't right to spy on people when they are showering or getting dressed. I don't know if you should show him your body. To me that is kind of weird. Good luck!!!

Answer 7

It sounds like your son is curious & it's time to educate him with age appropriate material. I would not suggest showing him your body as that will encourage him looking at you. Look around the internet for info that is ok for a child of that age. I know that sometimes children "spy" when they are curious & there are healthy ways to cope with this.

Answer 8

its nothing i think.

iv seen my mum loads of times in the nude lol NOT NICE

my little brother trys to spy on me and my mum its a boy thing trust me i have three brothers!!

....[x]....

Answer 9

Therapy.  Have him talk to someone.

Answer 10

i would say just sit him down and give him "the talk" about puberty and stuff....if you let it go unnoticed, who knows what he'll do to the girls at school! :/

Answer 11

Well, I would say something to him, that you know he is doing that. And explain to him that it is wrong to spy on people. But by no means show him your body. You can explain to him about the birds and the bees, or have his father, or a male figure explain it to him. But if you let it go unnoticed then he will think that it is fine to spy on people when it is not. Good Luck with this!

Answer 12

LET HIM LOOK ***   Then ask if he has any question? Then ex plane to him its not nice to spy on others.  

Answer 13

You should by no means let this go unnoticed.  Confront him about it and ask him why he does it. And he he is old enough to handle the s*x talk then talk to him about a male and female anatomy. Tell him why things are different and if you fell the need to show him a few EDUCATIONAL diagrams. But plz by no means deliberately show him your body. It'll probably do more damage than help.

Answer 14

r u serious, don't even dare show him ur body seriously thats like horrendous damage, not right, inappropraite... u get it. and don't even let it go unnoticed, i'm 14 and i would not in any way even dare to dream seeing any of my parents nude, uuggggh. advice: tlk to him, he's only curious (i hope he is only curious) don't let this go unnoticed at all thats the worst thing that can happen. its time for the "talk" u should probably keep an eye on him 2 the last thing u want is 4 him to get some girl pregnant. u might say its impossible but it happens, u should have eyes on the back of ur head anytime a girl comes by. good luck and seriously (don't show him ur body plse)

Answer 15

This has a lot to do with his age.  Just talk to him.  Tell him it's not ok to spy.  Also tell him that it is ok to ask questions.  It's probably time to have "the talk" with him.  If you're ok with showing him your body, then it shouldn't be too hard to talk to him about s*x.

Answer 16

You have to confront him. What he does at home he will do in public. Nip it in the bud at home so that he doesn't get his feelings hurt from spying on a  girl in public.