What to do...have a daycare child who is telling me he didn't do it?

Question

What in your opinion do I do with a child that I believe is guilty of trying and succeeding in stabbing my dog with a stick...He says he didn't do it that my 2 sons did it....they love this dog and have never tried to hurt him before....I'm so angry I could spit rocks...I've watched this boy for over a year...he is in behavioral school but I've never had this kind of problem with him before....and have defended him on more than one occasion....I know I need to tell his mom, but do I allow him to Keep coming to my house daily, knowing that he could be teaching my kids things I don't want them to know?

Answer 1

The kid obviously did it, and I think that talking to his parents would be the best option. If they want him to continue going to your house, I think you should give him another chance but warn his parents you'll be stricter. If you've never seen this behaviour before it could be a one off, but if he does it again he could be a bad influence to your sons. Although if he's denying it, he could have thought you wern't watching, which means he could have done other bad things.

Answer 2

Well first off, did you ask your son's if they saw anything happen like that.

  

2nd, I doubt it highly that your own boys would do any harm to their dog.

3rd, I would DEFINITELY notified the parents of what happened, not accusing their child, but to say that this is what happen and that you will get to the bottom of it.

4th, I would seize watching this boy for a week or so, so that the parents can drill him of what happened.

Just tell the parents, that you needed a break from daycare and needed to take care of some things.

When a child purposely harm an animal, they have some serious issues.

ADD and ADHD are NO excuse for harming animals.

Trust me, I know this.

There is more of a mental issue going on.

Good luck on that one, but I wouldn't watch that boy for a week till I got some answers from either your boys, or from someone that saw it.

:-)

Oh by the way, YOUR boys know right from wrong and I am sure they know that what this boy did was wrong.

You have done well with your boys, and would not worry so much on the other boy being a bad influence.  Your in control here with this boy being at your house.

Outside of your home when your boys get older, THEN you will worry about the children that are bad influences hanging around your boys.

Not much we as parents can do, but to only guide them in the right direction.

Answer 3

You know it sounds to me as though you really love this little boy. I can completely understand where you're coming from. You're first priority should be to your own children and if you no longer feel comfortable with him in your home than you need to let go. With that said, if your heart just sank with the thoughts of saying good bye than you need to talk with his mother and let her know what you're feeling. Tell her exactly what happened and that you need permission to discipline him in the same manner as you discipline your two boys. Make her understand and believe that you have his best interests at heart and if she isnt in agreement with you on how to handle him than she can make other arrangements. Chances are she wont find anyone else to take on the responsibility of a child with behavior problems.

Answer 4

How old is this kid?  Some kids of course will blame others when they do wrong.  Also, you've defended him on more than one occassion?  Were the situations just as bad, or typical behaviors that require a "time-out"?  Were all the situations things you did not see therefore can not confirm, so you don't tell the mom?  If they are confirmed misbehavements, then tell the mom.  Otherwise, I would just keep a close eye on the kids when you can.  Depending on the age of your kids, they can be your spies?  I think 5 yrs. old and up are capable of telling you the truth when something bad happens.   If this continues though, I would stop watching him.  Explain your reasons in honesty.

Answer 5

Your kids, pets and household are your priority. Don't feel bad in ending this relationship. I know you might want to help him but it's your kids who need you. We moms can't save the world but we can make our own household the best place. This kids sounds disturbed. I'd feel uneasy having him around. Good luck with this.

Answer 6

Talk with his mother first and explain the situation to her and that you want the best for her child, but that you also need the best for your children.  Maybe give the kid one more chance and let the Mother know this.  Also remember that some children are dispositioned to have behavioral tendencies and it is not the Mother's fault. ( ie..chemical imbalances).

But first and for most before you do this, take a breather and don't be very upset when talking with the Mother.

I wish you the best of luck. :)

Answer 7

I'm guessing the kid did it. He is tring to blme your kids and they sound like they would not hurt this dog. I would stop watching this kid and talk to his parents. I hope this helped.

-Tara

Answer 8

i would simply tell the boys parents that he is no longer welocme at your home , and when they ask why , tell them what happened . i am sure his  parents would do the same if it was vice versa