What to do if my fiance won't stand up for me

Question

Ok, so my fiance and I have been together for 3 years engaged for 1 . During this whole time I have had a problem with his younger sister, she has tried to make him break up with me before she even met me. I have never been anything but nice to her, invited her over cooked her huge meals to only be stood up last minute. So i stopped inviting her over after she stoop me for the 7th time. The rest of his family LOVES ME and i love them as well. His older sister is amazing, as is his brother and his parents. She is the only one that I've had a problem with, although I've never ever even shown a sign of dislike towards her (we have this whole respect thing) She is only one year older (23) and she acts like she is 5. My fiance and she don't get along for more than 40 minutes, they always end up in an argument, and she has made their mother cry many times in front of me. Recently she called me a b**** and we were all going on a trip in her car, I knew something happened but I wasnt sure what. He did not say anything and got in the car along with me, if I had known I dont know if I would have gone with her in her car. The thing that upsets me is that my fiance did not say anything to her at that moment, he just walked away. I know he is tryign to keep conflict down and I kind of understand his position but at the same time I have come to the realization that if he did not stand up for me now he might never stand up for me. I don't know what to do or if I should say something to him, I love him very much and don't want to hurt him. I am willing to put up with his sister because of him and his family because I would have never dealt with her in any other situation. I am even willing to still be nice to her despite everything she says or does because of him, but he doesn't see any of this as important or maybe he just doen't know what to say.

Answer 1

I am in a similar situation. My boyfriends brother does nothing but bad to our relationship and is trying to break us up. My advice to you. You need to support him and make him feel like you areby his side no matter what. If he didnt support you while you were dating, i can understand that, but now that you are both engaged, you need to set your priorities straight. He is commiting himself to you and needs to protect you. He might be a soft hearted bloke like my boyfriend. He has a hard time speaking his mind, but through the 6 years we have been together, i have seen great change in him. It's still not like i want it to be, but it sure is better than where it was. Stand your ground and dont let his sister walk all over you. She might just be jealous that her whole familyl oves you and feels liek she will be replaced. If anything i wouldnt give up on her either. Try to make her feel that you are not there to take her brother away from you but to add to their relationship. hope this helps!

Answer 2

The next time it happens say, you better stand up for me or I am leaving.  Or just avoid anything to do with that particular sister.

My mom and sisters live 5 and 20 minutes away, I never see them, it is soooo peaceful!!!  

Answer 3

You want a man who will stand up for you when you are innnocent or in the right. If he can't do that you are going to have continued problems while you are with him. Talk to him, let him know what you expect from him, and if he can't do that reconsider.  

Answer 4

Listen I had the same problem with my boyfriend. He has a kid with this girl and she acts with him like if she is so inocent don't do nothing

his sisters are like the girls from cinderella twins witches they stabed me in the back, his parents love this girl with his kid and my the one that pays the rent, bills, put the food in the table give them gifts is a ***** is not worth it plus one day he told his witches sisters that he is just with until he gets better financially. The point is don't let anybody step all over you. Don't be like me PLEASE THINK BEFORE YOU GO THRU WHAT i'm going belive me it hurts.  Love your self pray to god belive me it helps promise him you'll be good if he push this people away from you so you can be happy.  GOOD LUCK..

Answer 5

Hi your situtation was exactly the same as mine but with his female cousin, and all I did was stick up for myself and told his cousin this was that I had had enought of her and that I am never going to talk to her again because of all the trouble she caused me, I then told my husband that if he didnt like it its tough im not having anyone treat me that way as I have been nice and get slagged of 24/7 and you dont do anything about it so I did and I dont give a **** what you or your family think of me now I have stud my ground.

He just was worried about his family taking it out on his as he is a wimp sorry to say so I sorted it myself and everyone understud why I dont speak to her now at all.

There is only so much you can take it sounds like your hubby has been brought up around girls like mine was and he is scared of them, but I wasnt, and I had to do something  

Answer 6

It sounds like no one knows how to deal with her. Just be patient with him. He isn't standing up for himself either. Just avoid her as much as possible. If she is acting like a baby make sure you do not allow her to drag you into any fights because that is what she wants to do. Just walk away.