What to do if your friend makes tooo much eye contact?

Question

You know how in the US it is more popular to make eye contact than in other countries? I think I know how those other countries feel now. There is a guy I work with who, whenever he talks to you he just gazes into your eyes, almost unblinking. I always have to break eye contact early and I hate that!

We have worked together for about a year, and he seems to be an exceptional man: he is kind, thoughtful, generous, a hard worker and a wicked problem-solver. It's just that when he talks to you he stares you down like his boyish, light blue eyes are headlights and you'll be run over in a minute. O.o

He seems to do this with everyone, it's actually kind of amusing to see people squirm under his blithe gaze.. I am just terrible at social criticism and can't think how to light-heartedly my concern as to this faux-pas.

Ideas?

Answer 1

I see nothing at all wrong with what he does. and it's not just in the USA. there are some countries where direct eye contact is an insult.,  but that are not the western countries. it depends on a persons personality. this guy has a good self esteem.. he is not arrogant.. not everybody can hold eye contact like that but it's definitely not rude at all.  if you talk to someone.. or find someone attractive.. one does that. some people feel shy and have to break eye contact or they can look at the bridge of the other persons nose..  the other person won't know the difference... Every person is unique.. he is a normal guy.. and anyone who needs to look elsewhere for a moment .. and not hold eye contact all the time is normal too.. and some people are very shy.. they can't hold eye contact for long at all they blush and look away.. that's their personality. they can learn with time and experience to become less shy...  nothing is wrong.. all this is acceptable behaviour.. we are all unique and have our own ways. and particularities... x*x he deserves to be accepted as he is and you for how you are.. there is nothing to criticize in either behaviour..  xx

Answer 2

" Could you blink once in a while so I can get my perspective back?"

Answer 3

That doesn't have anything to do with being an American, just so you know. That's just an individual characteristic. There's really no way to change this about him, so i think you need to just accept it. There are two ways it could go:

1) you're honest with him, and he's hurt/offended, creating a MORE uncomfortable work environment than before

2) you make too much of a joke of it, and he might think you're hitting on him.