What was he like when he came back?

Question

What was your man like when he came back from training or back from a tour overseas? My fiance is going to Army basic training soon. I don't want him to leave but I'm already excited for him to come home. I've heard many people say that the separation has made their relationship stronger. "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" ??

Answer 1

When my hubby came back from basic he was still the same just more disciplined and respectful towards others. When he came back from his deployment our relationship was definitely stronger but his attitude towards certain things changed. Also he didn't have as much patience with our children as he did before but i expected that since he wasn't used to being with them anymore. I guess it just really depends on the person. If you support him through it then you relationship will take a turn for the better verses if you don't it will just cause a bunch of unnecessary problems for both of you.

Answer 2

In my experience, a little, and a few years ago, the military doesn't create a new person. They only build on what they're given.

If the guy was a jerk going in, he'll be a stronger, and more self-assured jerk when he gets out of boot camp.

If the guy had any violent tendencies going in, when he gets back from combat, he'll have experience being violent and latitude to be violent.

My guy saw it as bad as it gets. He "did the deed" in places most of us never heard of. He's over six feet tall and weighs almost 200 pounds -- with almost zero fat. He's a martial arts expert. He's also pretty good with just about any weapon you can put in his hands. But he was a good guy going in. So he's an extremely fit, powerful, self-assured good guy. He's able to focus on anything and get the job done.

He has it together. It takes a lot to upset him. I don't think I've ever seen him in what he calls "combat mode." But, if you were to try to break into our house, you might not make it past the living room alive.

As far as separation making the relationship stronger, I think it depends on the people in the relationship and the foundation of the relationship. Young romance is the most frequent casualty in the military. People who think they can't live without each other are forced apart and find out that they can. If one is deployed for any length of time, either or both parties can find themselves in temptation's way.

But a great many relationships survive and thrive. Probably the best thing to do is see how it goes. Don't have any great expectations. If you do... and he doesn't, you'll be disappointed. If you don't and he does.... you'll be pleasantly surprised.

Answer 3

From a guys point of view.I think its really good that your supporting him it definately helps, I will be leaving soon too. And my girlfriend is 100% behind me and it only makes me love her more. I have heard that it truly does make them strong. I am not saying it will be easy because its hard to be away from someone for that long but then when he gets back you will bot be glad to see each other. Hope that helps.

Answer 4

it depends on the person, i dated a guy who went into the army, we were crazy about each other, we wrote letters to each other, i went to go see him graduate boot camp, everything was great, but when he came home he started ignoring me and being an ******, it was so weird, he wanted me back a month later but it was to late by then, then i started dating another guy a year after we dated he wanted to join the Air Force (i guess i just attract them or something) anyway he said he understood if i didn't want to wait for him because of what happened to me before but that he would love it if i would, so i did, fearing he would come back a totally changed person, he came back and was better then ever, he have been married for over 5 years now! good luck to you!  

Answer 5

The separation will either make your relationship, or break it. Depending on how you handle it. But coming back from BCT is a lot different than coming back from Iraq or Afghanistan.