What will it take for me to meet a guy who wants to MARRY me?

Question

I already know---your gonna say, "Im easy" or I wasn't "marrying material"---So before you do---please READ. I am 25 y/o. Single. No children, have a college degree from a private institution, work full-time, and have been told I am extremely attractive. I KNOW I'm not perfect and have made poor decisions in my past relating to men, sexual dealings, etc. But it's seems like even when I take my time, and a guy seems to genuinely be interested in me---it NEVER goes beyond s*x. Even if I WAIT. And then, I'll find out months not years, but months later than he has had a baby with some other woman or is engaged. This is messing with my self-esteem HIGHLY. I can't figure out, why I don't attract a man who wants that type of life-long comittment with me. And I'm not desperate. I turn down PLENTY of men and have been single for 3 years now. So, I have taken the time for 'myself' and all that other stuff people tell you to do. I travel, I have hobbies, I volunteer---so it's not like I'm just throwing pity parties. Yet---I am so discouraged because I'm NOT getting any younger---and I don't even have a good guy friend who can consistently call me. What's wrong with me? When will I have my turn to have a baby and get married? I'm so depressed....

Answer 1

Be more assertive! Make more guy friends and eventually you might find someone.

Answer 2

Don't despair!!  It sounds like you're picking the wrong type of guy and believe me I can relate.  Be sure to set your standards very high because you sound like a total catch to me for any man.  Make sure though that the man you choose is worthy of you.  You are smart, kind, successful, college educated, attractive, etc.   Make sure the guy is all of those things and more (especially the college educated part).  You've got time to be choosy so hang with your girlfriends and have fun.  Just give it up to your higher power and he will provide.  Good luck

Answer 3

try an online dating service and always remember to be yourself!

Answer 4

you sound like fantastic marriage material minus the fact that youre a bit obsessive, but h**l nobody is perfect.  I'd say come on over and we'll get hitched, but I'm 27 and not looking to get married for a few more years.  I'd rather have my house almost paid off and college debt wiped clean.  I'll carry on a long term relationship without issue.

Answer 5

Pretty lady,  I am glad you post as that.  This shows me that you KNOW your worth and are NOT giving up!   Maybe men are intimidated by your strength.   Your life seems full of pleasures that you initiated.  Not all women are strong enough to claim their lives as their own.  GOOD JOB!  Until we know our own likes and dislikes it is hard to have a healthy relationship with a man.  NOW, the solution?  SKIP the bar scene.... bar = temporary relationship

Try volunteering somewhere one  day a week for a few hours, in doing this you will meet a higher quality man with similar interests.  Even better?  Try a church event . Many churches have picnics, dances or coffee hours that are open to the public.    

Answer 6

You haven't met the right one yet, hang in there.  I know it get frustrating, but  you will meet him.   xox

Answer 7

self esteem? you have the wrong kind.

the fact that people tell you youre extremely attractive is somewhat of a bad thing, especially if they are men.

people have a way of putting others in the place where they think they should go. by people constantly telling you that youre gorgeous, theyre encouraging a stereotypical behavior. as in if your pretty, youre stupid... etc.

you need to start dressing and acting conservative and keeping your s*x life (and other noncoservativities) to yourself.

keep your head up high, almost as if youre stuck up, but not in the pretty way, in the smart way, but do not judge people.

i have notice guys like conflicting attributes. like for example, the more freewilled you are, the more conservative you should act.

dont show your true self until a guy will demand you open up. that man will be yours.

be different. but it wont pay off until you are completely positively sure of yourself. dont let people tell you something you do is strange because opinion is everything and your opinion is no worse that someone elses.

i know this doesnt seem like it relates to your question, but trust me, it hella does.

men love strong women

Answer 8

Relax, you are 25 not 35.  Give it some time.  Enjoy casual dating and don't worry about it.  The right guy will come along before you know it.

Answer 9

nothing is wrong with you girl.just keep on your life when you are not even thinking of having a relationship that's when it will comes, i used to think like that but when i said to god and myself well it has to be in my moment when god saids so. and you have a long life on front of you i was 35 when i use to think like you so don't worry

Answer 10

dont know it sorry

Answer 11

If depressed: see a doctor and don't wait too long, stress tells..

Don't be "easy" men should love you for your personality, s*x can wait a few months

Join a club of like minded people to get more contacts, preferably a christian one as the chances of meeting dishonest people are a LOT smaller

Answer 12

yes yes or no?? c'est la vie

Answer 13

hi girl.. have you assessed yourself lately? are you too kind or too tough, too serious or too childish? or too loose or too demanding? actually, no one knows you best but your own self.. you could maybe ask your family of what they think about you.. what are your negative traits, and what are those things that you should change.. well, you don't really have to change yourself, because there will always be someone who will accept you for who you are, but if it's for your own good, then you might consider it too..

if you think all is fine with you, then just wait, just think that those guys in your past weren't good enough for you. do not be depressed. if ever someone will come, try to give your best to make the relationship work out and show that guy that you are the best partner he can have and he won't be needing anybody else. =)  

Answer 14

Keep the faith - just like me.

Answer 15

Drop the game playing, and be honest. Smile dress moderately decent and stop looking for Prince Charles.

Answer 16

im 23 and have never ever even dated....

feel better now???

Answer 17

a boob job

Answer 18

First you have to be a 10+ and have tons of cash.  All kidding aside, just go out and meet guys everywhere and have fun.  Pretty soon they will all be chasing you and you'll  be saying, "How do I choose?"

Answer 19

Sounds like to me is that you may be scaring off all the Mr. Rights. It looks like you have so much going for you that any guy with marriage on his mind thinks you are way out of their league. Another point to consider is where are you looking for Mr. Right. Start noticing the guys you run in to are they the life long commitment type. If not, maybe change your social scene. One thing I know from experience is that love is waiting in the most unexpected places. Stop looking so hard. I wasn't looking for my soul mate when I found him. And lastly, this is something I had to learn, lower your standards. I mean not bottom of the barrel but maybe try talking to some of the guys that are not at the top of your list.  

Answer 20

my daughter who is 31 has the same problem.it seems there is a shortage of decent men anymore.most only want s*x,still live with mom and dad and have crappy credit,don't work,have no ambition and don't care that their life is going no where.too many have b astards running around that they don't care about and many don't see them or pay any regular support.as long as young girls sleep around ,shack up and have babies out of wed lock and men don't have to be men this trashy trend will continue.

women make it too easy for men to never grow up and since so many people have no sense of GOD or decency or even common morals there is no need to be civilized and be married and have a legitimate family,(husband,wife,children)

it is what is wrong with society today!

i hope you can find a decent man who knows that marriage is a wonderful part of life and comes before children,good luck with that.

try a church by attending or like my church offers ways for singles with like faith and things in common to meet and date.i am a Seventh day Adventist Christian.GOD bless you!

Answer 21

It will happen when you least expect it. Just don't fret about it. They always say when you stop looking it turns up!  

Answer 22

Personally I think true love is an extremely rare thing.  That is why so many people go from infatuation to infatuation and so many people give up and settle.  

I thought alot of myself at 25 too.  At 45, still have my hair, in great shape, my own business, money in the bank, house in a trendy neighborhood, no kids, all the toys, never married and my self esteem is in the toilet.  I see my not physically attractive, bankrupt, loser, deadbeat dad friends use women like kleenex and have women way out of their league standing in line while I rarely even date any more.  For me all the good ones seem taken and the decent single ones all seem to come with lots of baggage.  (kids from their first marriage with a guy they didn't really love but wanted to hurry and get married and have kids before it was too late)

Don't settle.  If what you have been doing isn't working.  Stop that and go do something else.  Go where the kind of guy you would want to marry would go, and then just be beautiful and approachable.  Sorry, from the male perspective it seems so easy for beautiful women (or even ugly ones with bad personalities).