What would be the appropriate amount of money to give in this situation?

Question

My cousin is getting married for a second time, and I've never met his fiance. We can't go to their wedding because they set the date 2 weeks before ours (after we announced our wedding date) and they are in another state. I already bought them a wedding card that I'm planning to mail to them. How much money should I put in the card?

Answer 1

I agree $50.00 sounds fine.

Answer 2

Put in what you can comfortably afford.  Because your wedding is coming up, if $25 is your limit, then send $25.  If you can afford to send more, and you and your cousin have been close during your lives, then by all means send more.  Only your cousin and his wife should ever know the amount you sent, anyway.  It's no one else's business.

Absolutely do NOT base your decision on their "per plate" costs for their reception.  Never.  EVER.  The costs of the wedding reception are the decisions of the bride and her parents and even the groom, and it's up to them to plan an event they can afford.  Guests are absolutely never obligated to purchase a gift or send money.  And they are certainly not required to send a gift or money that covers the cost of their dinner.

You also don't have to send money based on the items in their registry.  

The whole idea of a GIFT is that it is exactly that - Freely given according to the financial situation of the giver, and gladly accepted by the recipient regardless of the dollar amount involved.

Answer 3

I would think $50 at the most since you are not attending

Answer 4

None.  You have no obligation to include money in the card.

Answer 5

I would send $25 or $50 I really think $25 would be more than enough!

Answer 6

as much as you feel comfortable giving .i would give nothing just a sorry we could not be there is what i would include in the card

Answer 7

$50

Answer 8

Depends...

For the average couple..

If your married.. I'd say $100 from you and your husband

If your Single.. $50..

You can go up from there but I was always told that these figures were the minimum amounts you should give...

As far as $25 that everyone else is saying... I think that is more appropriate for a birthday gift...

But hey... it's all about how much you love your cousin...

Quite frankly I will not want to be the one sitting there when she opens my card with $25 or $35 dollars in it and the rest of my cousins gave 2 or 3x as much...

Just my thoughts...

Answer 9

Find out where they're registered and look at the prices for some of the merchandise that you might have purchased were you giving them a desired item.

FYI, the female is a 'fiancee', and the male is a 'fiance'.  As written in your question, it looks like a g*y wedding ;-)

Answer 10

anywhere from 50-100 dollars seems appropriate.

if he marries a third time, a nice present could be a scolding.

Answer 11

Protocal is normally this:  If you have just yourself, you would put in the amount the meal at the reception would cost; if there are two of you, you would double it. So if they are having chicken and beef, about $25 per person.

Answer 12

Under the circumstances, whatever is comfortable for you pocket at this time should be a gracious plenty!

Answer 13

I said you should give them $40. you don't want to break the bank as you are getting married yourself and you might need the extra cash too. don't feel preassure to give them something that might affect your budget later on. Congrats on ur big day. God bless you.

Answer 14

$50. It's his second wedding and your not even going. & they are having it 2 weeks before yours. Will they attending yours?