What would you do and why??

Question

Ok, say you have 2 small children, have a mortgage and worked at a job with your parent and you pretty much worked side by side all day. Then, unfortunately your parent that you love VERY much passes away. Now your job offers you your parent's position with a pay raise. Now keep in mind that you have 2 kids to support and a mortgage to pay, but the parent you love just passed away and even continuing the job you have done side by side with them would be very hard on you emotionally and everything to do with that job would only remind you of your parent everyday at work or years and years to come.

You have 3 options:

#1 Take your parents position with a pay raise, although it might be emotionally difficult for you for awhile, but will make life better for your family

#2 Pass up the promotion and just contiue the position you already have and be reminded of your parent everyday. But, will keep everything the same for you financially

#3 Take another position offered in another department, but lose out on 10 hours overtime pay, which might cause some financial difficulty for your family, but you wouldn't have to be reminded of your parent everyday

What option would you choose and why??

Do you think that taking option #3 would be selfish?

Answer 1

I'm sorry.  I lost my dad last year and know how hard this can be.  Whether you are reminded of your parent while you are at work or at home, the store, wherever, you will be reminded of them no matter what.  I say take the job and pay raise and do your parent proud by doing the best d**n job you can with your new promotion....its not really any different than taking over your parents company after they pass.  

Answer 2

I would take option 1 and take the pay raise, and have the mind set that because of the death of my parent I was able to help my family more. I would remember them all the time and how great it was to work with them. Because someone dies, does not mean you don't hurt for years to come, but you can build on what you had and remember all the good times. If you could ask your parent what they would do ( you know them well enough) what would they say. Because someone dies, does not mean that we suffer needlessly for them. No one wants their family to suffer because of their death.  

Answer 3

Your parent would be proud of you and want what is best, for you and your kids.

So, what would they tell you... to give up in grief and make an empty gesture to remove yourself out of respect and love, neither of which are in any doubt - or do the best thing for yourself and your family.

Perhaps another option can be brought to bear... speak to your employer and ask that if it is option 1 for now, and yes you will help them out during this time of loss both for you and for them, perhaps they can consider you first for future jobs at THAT level elsewhere as the direct and immediate replacement is hard on you though you appreciate their supportiveness and you will do it for now.

Answer 4

Who better to fill your parent's shoes?  Take their position.  Time heals wounds, I promise.  

Answer 5

hey hunni.

i'm so sorry to hear about your parent, R.I.P to her/him?

Look Hunni, Your parent has gone, you cant bring he or she back, your future is your children and your life, so your going to have to get on with life, you cant go ruining yours and your kids life because you dont want to think about your parent. Of course its not selfish, i mean dont you want a better life for your children? Your allowed to mourn, but dont let it ruin your life!

Take option 1 and dont regret it.

Its very sad time obv. for you, and my thoughts are with you xx

Good Luck and i'm sure you'll make the right decision!

xoxoxoxoxox

Answer 6

I lost my mom a few years back ( i took a part time job in the store she last worked in, and really it helped me to remember her even more, people would share their story's about her with me) and just now am able to feel some what like the old me, it takes a while to Work Thur that kind of a death. you will never get over that, but sooner or later you will be able to remember all the good times with that parent. If i were you i  would take that position, it will also ( I Believe) help you to heal. Good Luck to you and Please Take Option Number 1

Answer 7

I would take option one.To better my life and my family.

you are always going to think of you deceased parent wether you take the job or Not,That's just a given.Work or at home something will come up that will remind you of  your to gone parent.I am sure they would want you  to be Happy and financially secure.

Answer 8

I would take opt one b/c i wouldn't want to forget the times we spent together. The money would help you financially and I wouldn't want someone else to have the job that my parents worked hard at and would look at it as in someways as carrying on the business. I would think of the times to come where if I had a bad day what they would say or handle the situation. The days you need comfort their present would seem to be there to cheer me up. Hard answer, I haven't loss my parents but close relatives and sometimes being in their room helps me at those lonely times