What would you do if you were in the predicament?

Question

i was seeing a guy for the longest time, him and I clicked the first time we have talked, we talked for about 8 hrs on the phone the first time exchangeing different converstions, its like i knew him for the a lifetime. I'm only 21 y/o and he is 40 y/o i went to see him many of times in his hometown, and after coming back home each time things started going down south, then things would get a lil bit better, then finally everything hit the fan. Nothing never seemed right anymore. I tried to give everything i had into this realtionship while, i had a full time job and went to school full time, i was there for him mentally but not physically. about 2 weeks ago we finally ended it, i cant stop thinking about him, i tried to write him a few times in a emial and jst xed it out or i he said he was going to block me from everything so i can see him online and that, but he didnt, i really want to talk to him again, maybe even in person. but im unsure of my own stragies, on how to get someone back that yu have completely fell in love with. what can i do, we have talked about spending our lives together, even making a family at that. its been really hrd the last two weeks and im really unsure about what i can do? can anyone plz help me out on this

Answer 1

It sounds that he took you for a ride, he's in his 40's who got himself a 20 year old. Now that the reality of him not feeling the same about you, as you do him he's trying everything in the book to break it off with you.

You deserve better, nobody should be treated with such disrespect. Most of us woman have this 'caring' chip in our hearts that make us fall for the guy hard sometimes.

I've been through what you're going thru, & am going thru this right now with this guy I've been with 20+ years. I'm tired of giving, giving, giving, & getting nothing in return. Not a thank you, or even told that I look nice. Simple things that are free.

I have 2 children (16 & 10) & I'm planning on leaving because he caught me off guard 3 weeks by taking off for a week, & had his friend tell me that he no longer wanted to be with me, find a job, & get on with my life.

So I'm in couselling, bettering myself, & looking for a job. I can't tell you what to do, but I'd leave him, & be thankful that you don't have children to also worry about. My children are my world, & I don't know what I'd do without them, but I want to show them that their Mother's tough, & hopefully will be teaching them that no person disrepects, or uses you like a door mat.

Good Luck to you, you are still young, you should be happy, not worrying about this person who'll talk & treat you like he's been doing.

Answer 2

A little motherly advice here, honey.

He is wayyyyyyyy to old for you. What do you think a 40 year old man wants with a 21 year old woman? He's old enough to be your father!!

This man is probably married with kids your age and is fooling around on the side. He will stay married.  His wife probably found out about you so he can't see you or talk to you anymore. He had to block you from his email so she wouldn't see your name anymore.  He was dumb to have you to his hometown anyway. Do you want a dumb man in your life? Men who cheat on their wives will do the same to the woman they desire for a while.

Find someone in their 20's that you have more in common with than this old man. You don't need that stress now. Go back to school and work and concentrate on growing up for someone else.