What would you do if your daughter cussed at you?

Question

My 16 year old daughter, who is normally a very well behaved girl, had an argument with her father the other night and she said, "Why don't you just go f*ck off, I'm so f*cking sick of you" to him. We were so shocked that we just grounded her, but this has never happened before. I was wondering what an appropriate punishment would be for other parents?

Answer 1

teenage kids are rebellious by nature but as long as you brought them up respectful of you they'll be easy to handle.

but if ever my daughter said something like that to me, i would slap her, take away her privileges, ground her and ignore her  until she apologizes properly. i didn't sacrifice a lot of things just to have my kids do that to me.

but you should also ask yourself what made her angry enough to say those words.

Answer 2

My mom always gave us house-work.

We hated it and she had less to do.

It worked!

Answer 3

what did he do to make her that mad??

Answer 4

When I read that I said "whoa".

I would never have said this to my parents.  I never used the f-word ever.  Teenagers use words like that to make a point, to stress that they are angry.  Yes, its inappropriate to talk that way to you so you need to let her know that, if you haven't told her already.  I think grounding is good, but also take away a privilege.

Answer 5

First of all I would make her apologize then I would make her do chores, ones no one wants like scrubbing toilets etc. Then I would sit her down and talk to her, and make it clear it will NOT be tolerated again or she gets a very serious punishment, like loosing all priveledges phones, TV, friends for 2 months. Once is a mistake, twice it is not tolerated.

My kids are not that old yet, but I can say no matter how mad I have been at my dad I have never spoke to him like that and I am 35 LOL

Answer 6

To be honest, if my 16yr old child (my son is only 9 right now) said that to me, I probably would hit her in the mouth before I realized what happened and sit with the regret of possibly overreacting. I know that if I had said that to my mother at 16, she would've knocked the taste out my mouth and had no regret about it.

If I were in that situation, I'd have to look at my child's behavior normally. My son is normally very well behaved also. So, to curse me out like that would be extremely out of character for him. I think I'd send him to his room long enough for me to cool down and try to come up with some reason as to why he'd act so out of character. I figure, even though he'd be 16, he'd still have pressure from school/friends/family and maybe he was at a boiling point. Maybe the argument was all it took to trigger such a strong emotion. Once I'd calmed down, I'd have to ask him why he spoke to me that way. If he was upset about something else, we'd talk about it. If he felt he was so "grown" were he could talk to me however he saw fit, I figure it'd be time to discuss how he was going to take care of himself outside of his basic needs (in addition to being grounded) because other than shelter, food, and decent clothing, that'd be all I responsible for. He wouldn't get anything else from me but the basics.

Answer 7

Ha, welcome to the exciting world of teen monsters. Take her cell phone away that should do it. If she does not have one ground her for two weeks. Good Luck!

Answer 8

I would not care how old she is or how well behaved she normally is. If she wants to talk like that to her parents (or anybody for that matter) I would wash her mouth out with soap.

Answer 9

She says it in public. Would you rather her cuss out in public and act like a angel in front of you when she really isn't?

Answer 10

First, she needs to explain why she used these words.  Next, she needs to understand that her explanation of why she was upset is completely understandable, that it is the manner that she told her father she was angry that is unacceptable.  Tell her that it takes an intelligent person to express their feelings - not to use the F-bomb in order to replace intelligent expression.

That being said, I would take away some influence that isn't allowing her to "blossom".  Do you like her friends?  Does she spend too much time on the computer?  

Also give her more responsibility as she's no longer a child.  If she does it again, the consequences have to be harsher, but tell her beforehand that her language is unacceptable.