What would you ladies with a toddler and another baby on the way suggest?

Question

I need suggestions on how to cope with having a toddler and a newborn at home. I plan to work at home after the baby is born in July. I'm worried about how I'm going to do it. My relatives just tell me, "Oh you'll figure out a way." That is of no help. I was thinking of keeping my 3 yr old in daycare but it's expensive with the cost of gas these days. I really need some suggestions here. Thanks ladies.

Answer 1

It'll be a challenge. Your work will probably be best achieved during the toddler's naptimes and bedtimes/downtimes (during a movie, coloring next to you as you work etc.). Also, have your toddler "help" you at work by coloring pictures or writing down stuff, doing arts and crafts, etc. The newborn, as you know, will either be unpredictable or will eventually make a schedule of waking, sleeping, etc. You can work around the newborn's schedule. It'll be tough but you can have kind manuever your toddler to work with you and your work scedule... Good luck and I know it'll be worth it!

Answer 2

It might be tough to find a steady pace, at first, but eventually you will fall into it.

Think of the mantra;

"People over things"

It pretty much applies to all aspects of our lives as mothers.  Don't expect your childrens schedules to revolve around the schedule you will have made for yourself.  It will probably be the other way around.  Depending on the kind of work you do, you may end up doing the majority of it through midnight feedings while your 3 year old sleeps.

Try to keep calm, and include the 3 year old.  Give him or her plenty of projects to do while you do your own :)

Answer 3

What your relatives tell you is the truth. You will find a way. You are going to have to set up a routine...as much as possible. Get into the groove of things.

Answer 4

I am the same way.

I am not keeping my son in daycare while I am at home with the newborn (due in November). I want them to be together, and my toddler is a mellow boy. He is good at dealing with changes. We keep telling him every hour or so that there is going to be a "new baby" soon. I always ask if he is going to help me with him/ her. I try to educate him on what will change so he will know ahead of time. Plus the hospital I go to has a class on dealing with more than one child. I start to take it in two weeks.

Plus while I am in that class there is a "class" for him called Super Siblings where he will learn on how to deal with the new baby at home.

On the "You'll find a way" it is sort of true. Once you get the swing of things it will all fall into place. I am thinking of it like this: I did not know what I was going to do, or handle things when I just gave birth to my son. Now we have "the swing of things". I know that a lot will change when this baby is born, but I will have to see what it will be like when it is born. No one can really tell you "this is what you will do."

Also.......... if it sort of helps with your toddler........... I was told to have the "new baby" buy the older sibling a toy/ stuffed animal, and vise versa. So that way they feel better about the new one. That is shows the "new baby" cannot wait to meet him. It sounds weird, but I have heard of a lot of people doing it with great results.

Answer 5

some toddlers are very careful around newborns, and usually try to help you out with the baby, en\ven when they are 3. try to get your toddler involved with the baby and it should calm them down, and make them happy, which will make you less stressful. if it gets too hectic plan a playdate with another parent for the toddlers or ask if someone could take them for a while where you can rest. it will be ok

Answer 6

Don't worry.  It won't be as bad as you're imagining.  I have a set of 2 year old twins and an 8 month old baby.  People ask me all the time how I do it....I just do it.  It's in our nature to be mothers.  I work part-time (take my kids w/ me) and go to school full-time (have a babysitter in my home).  

When I became prego with my 3rd child I was devastated.  My twins were only 7 months old, and I was overwhelmed.  When I gave birth everything changed.  My kids are the center of my life.  They come first and everything else just falls in place.  After you have your baby people will ask how you do it.....your answer will be "I just do it!"  

My suggestion is keep your kids in your home...childcare is way too expensive.

Answer 7

Watch Supernanny dvds 1st season.  Lots of people trying what you suggest.